Today.
As I was screeching talking to Nels on the phone
I realized that I sounded like a hysterical Lilie.
And I couldn't help myself.
Nor did I care.
Here I was, at my computer. Minding my own business and talking to the optometrist's secretary on the phone, when I glance up to see a small, dark shape streak from behind my bedroom door and scurry down my hall and into the kitchen!
AHHHhhhh!
Enter this guy . . .
What??!! Oh no you didn't! just run down my hall!
(Luckily I was on hold, as what came out of my mouth would have sounded very strange to the secretary.)
I quickly finished my business on the phone and went directly to get a mouse trap. I can't have MICE running through the house with my little children crawling on the floor! No mice in my house. It's a standing rule.
I immediately set it with some peanut butter and put it next to the dishwasher. I called Nels to make sure that peanut butter was the best choice and figured that I'd just go downstairs and if Mr. Mouse actually came out and got trapped before Nels got home, well, he could just wait and die and I wouldn't have to see it.
NO!
As I was talking to Nels on the phone, that stupid mouse came right out from under the dishwasher WHILE I WAS STILL STANDING 3 FEET AWAY!! and started eating it!!!!
Enter hysterical little girl screaming/talking.
Long story a little bit shorter, as I am screeching in Nels's ear, the trap goes off. I try to convince Nels that he needs to drive the 15 minutes home from work to pick it up and put it in the garbage can. --- (Because, after all, I'VE SEEN NELS KILL A MOUSE WITH HIS BARE HAND BEFORE!!!)
He won't come.
I resolve to just leave it there -- but am secretly thinking that I might ask Lilie to cover it with a piece of paper or something. You know, because what if it's brains are squished out or something???!!!! When all of a sudden Lilie, who has been attracted by my hysterics says that it's not in the trap and it's MOVING!!! I then decided that while it was still stunned, I'd let Gertie in and she could just eat it. After all, she catches mice all the time (and leaves them dying in the grass or on my back doorstep). However, because I'm acting so crazy and talking so loud, she runs away from me and won't come back.
Therefore.
If I am to save my family from a bloody mouse running all over my house, I must take care of it myself ----- with the assistance of Lilie.
A broom, a dustpan, a lot of screaming (from me and none from Lilie), to the backyard garbage can, to remembering that the garbages are in the front yard, with a live mouse skittering around in the dustpan!!! {{sigh}} He is gone.
Well. Technically he is still alive, but now trapped in my garbage can. Where he will die a sad and hot, long and hopefully agonizing death. Thank you.
And I saved all my family from the plague.
Thank you very much.
No thanks to this guy ---
Who just wanted to put me on speakerphone for all the guys in his office.
11 comments:
To funny. I love that you needed lilie to help you. And I love your pictures from CA I can't wait to see San Diego 2.....
Oh, my goodness!!! I would have freaked, too! Nasty, nasty, nasty. Remember the mouse I thought was in the dryer??? I couldn't do laundry for a week. Ryan convinced me it was a bird in the vent, but later confessed it was a mouse. He found it.
ahhhahaha! that is me, I would be there, doing that. Have been there and done that! I saw C kill a mouse in our closet smashing its head with a two by four (some scrap wood we had laying around for some reason in or near our room) I've had night mares of that moment ever since!
want to read a funny/gross mouse story go here http://kimberlyannonline.blogspot.com/2008/08/safe-no-more.html
That's my lovely sister's mouse story it cracks me up!
I love you Rach. Absolutely hilarious. Just think, if Nels had come home, you wouldn't have this great story to tell :)
I would have done the same thing! Anthony would have did the same thing Nels did! Unfeeling men....don't they know thats part of their job..to save their wives from filthy rodents! LOL! I loved your description! It was great!
What a jerk! At least you caught yours. We have one wandering in our basement and avoiding 4 traps. I was wondering if you'd ever realize where Lilie gets it :-)
I. HATE. MICE. I am so sorry you had a mouse. I would love to tell you that next time I would come to help, but I would be lying. I make Troy kill the mice and all creepy crawly things. I don't even know where the mouse traps are!!!!
LOL!!!!!!!!! That pic of Nels is the icing on the cake. Perfect blog post, my friend!
love.
You are the best. I love you to death. I would have done the same thing.
I have so been there and done that. I actually called Jeremy up sobbing that he HAD to come home and kill it or I wouldn't be able to stay in the house. I was worthless. I honestly sat in the car with the kids until Jeremy came home from work and saved me. So, I 100% completely understand and commersiterate.
I think your mouse escaped and made a road trip to my house! We have one and luckily dad came over to witness my hysterics. Unfortunately we can't find him, but I feel confident that we will with the 8 mouse traps I have laying around!
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