Kaleidoscope: Part C

My Hazel has always done well in school. She is incredibly curious, social, and loves to make her teachers and others happy. She loves learning.

In third grade, however, Hazel started to have some difficulty with staying focused in class. Not like, she needs medication or anything, but she's just a distractible child. Hazel lives . . . outside of herself. She's very extroverted and loves feeling and hearing and seeing and just experiencing everything. If she's supposed to be concentrating, someone talking or wiggling or drawing next to her is sort of like . . . "squirrel!" :) This has always been the case, but in 3rd grade it became more apparent. I think, for the first time, she was actually being challenged with information she didn't already know. Her teacher discussed it with us and came up with some pretty good solutions to help her focus better. As time went on it didn't eliminate the challenge, but helped a lot and she made good progress.

As Hazel's parents, we already knew that learning how to focus and stay on task are things that she will be working on for a long time. A challenge as she learns to harness her vast mental and physical energy. We all have different traits that we have to learn how to use properly. She's not going to learn this skill in a couple of months or even a year. It takes time and it's just part of having a human body. I love my Hazel's ability to live completely in a moment - in a feeling, an experience. It's beautiful and unique.

This last school year started off really well. Hazel loved her new 4th grade teacher. His teaching style and organization fit Hazel really well. He was happy, she was happy, I was happy.

At this same time, I got one of those rare, very clear impressions from the Lord. It was time to re-label my homeschooling file folder.

{Interesting Idea: WILL Do WHEN Inspired (Start Thinking About It)} 

I didn't feel like I needed to do it right then, but I just really felt like I needed to start thinking about it. Uh . . . what?! Okay . . . that's scary.

Then we moved.

I really liked the new school and the girls did great at making new friends, the staff was wonderful, but it was still a big adjustment. We went from having a minimal homework load in Sandpoint with an emphasis on at-home reading, to 8 page homework packets that needed to be completed each week. From reading 4 or more books a month (for fun) to barely reading a short one (for a book report). Also, Hazel and her new teacher seemed to have a difficult time understanding one another. I got good reports from Hazel about how things were going, but then at her first PTC, I felt like all her teacher could see was where she was struggling. Not one positive that didn't end with, "but . . ." She also complained about Hazel not paying attention enough in class. Nothing new there - but when I asked what she would suggest we do, I got, "Well, she just needs to focus more." Great idea! Hazel was doing awesome, she was making progress in math, learning new concepts, loves writing and is very descriptive and engaging, but all I heard from her teacher is that she needed to do better.

As the months passed, my happy and curious girl started saying things like, "I'm just not good at this." "I don't want to go to school." "I'm not good at math." She was often in tears at the end of the day as she plodded her way through, not only the large homework packet, but as many as 4 pages of worksheets that didn't get completed in class that day.

All of a sudden Hazel's evenings were stressful and barely had time for anything but homework.

I finally emailed her teacher begging for mercy to explain the situation and ask for some help. I asked if it might be possible to eliminate some of the busy-work in the homework packets and wondered what on earth is going on in class that Hazel's not completing her work? Her response:

"I’ll admit, I’ve have been a little frustrated with Hazel. She seems to work at her own pace, slow and steady (but consistent and thorough which I like), so utilizing any and all class work time is crucial. I’m sorry for the frustration you’ve been feeling with the homework. If Hazel can do a better job staying focused, using class time productively, and taking responsibility for her actions, she’s going to be fine. She seems to understand the consequences for not completing work, and doesn’t like it. So I told her that that is up to her, she holds her own fate and responsibility to continue to make good choices every day."

{sigh} I'm a big supporter of "natural consequences" but from my perspective a good teacher should be working on ways to help her students, not just punish them for the things that they struggle with or shame them in class because they "work at their own pace." I emailed her teacher back asking if she had any solutions and got no reply.

To her defense, this teacher is young with only one very small child. I don't think she has any concept of what it's like to have a busy family life or how stupid it is to just expect that a 10-year-old will magically "do better" and "utilize any and all class time" all on their own by embarrassing them in front of their peers and creating a classroom that is noisy and disorganized.

All in all, we made it through the rest of the year, but neither Hazel nor I have ever been quite so excited for summer break.

Daughters in His Kingdom

The sun spills into our bedroom windows early every morning - a fact that Nels is not overly fond of, but which I love.

This morning it is especially bright and prompts me to get up before the rest of my family. I need to bake the bread that had been rising on the counter all night for lunches today and I have five bodies in the home that have been in need of some clean clothing for a while.

I actually love doing laundry in the quiet morning sunlight. I hasn't been happening much, as evidenced by the five loads waiting to be washed, but I need to make it my routine. It makes me happy.

I turn on the oven, dump my bubbly dough onto the counter to rise a second time, and find the last session of General Conference to listen to while I start the washer and plunge into the four loads awaiting folding. Testimonies of Jesus Christ from apostles of the Lord fill my soul and I am reminded how important it is to drink from Living Waters daily. Another thing that hasn't been happening nearly often enough.

The girls wake up, Nels needs clothes that haven't been washed yet, the bread is cooking, and it's time for breakfast. The morning is rocky and filled with some frustration as I try (in vain?) to teach my girls to be responsible for getting themselves ready for school. I'm rushing to finish lunches, packing up hot bread. Everyone is late this morning. Again. {sigh}

Get Violet breakfast (she's almost always last to rise), clean up the spilled milk and flying flour. Change a diaper and back to the laundry.

As I slip the headphones onto my head I start THIS talk. Given at the General Women's Meeting in March and am transported back to attending that meeting with my two darling older girls. My eyes fill with tears and I remember that I still haven't written about that experience. Maybe it's just small, but I don't want to forget.

This was the first year that all the women of the church have met together in a General meeting. Both the Young Women and the Relief Society have each had their own yearly meetings, but this year all women from age 8 and up were combined. I've never had a chance to attend something like this with my daughters and the Spirit was overwhelming.

As I listened to counsel from inspired women and a loving apostle, tears streamed down my face and I was given a glimpse of the blessing it is to me to walk this path of life with these courageous, righteous, and beautiful girls at my side. I was reminded that these girls are my equals in every way. We knew and loved one another before we came to this earth and we are here to help each other return to the Father and do a great work while here. The meeting was one of the most spiritually charged moments I've had in parenting and I know that my girls felt it as well. Both Hazel and Lilie had tears in their eyes for much of the meeting as they snuggled their sweet faces into each of my shoulders and repeatedly told me how much they love me. They whispered to me how much they want to do the right thing and how happy they were.

I am truly a blessed woman.

Unpacking . . .

It'll kind of be like unpacking your house after someone else packed it up. You're never sure what's in the box and all too often you've got a bunch of random things in there that don't belong with the rest and you don't really know what to do with them. Yep. That's what this post is going to be like.

Speaking of unpacking, I've still got about 25 boxes to unpack. I'm not thrilled. I'm tired of unpacking. I feel like I've been unpacking for 2.5 years.

It's been foggy for the past three days. Everything is covered in hoarfrost. The weeping birch trees look like frozen fountains. It's kinda magical.

Hazel, Elsie, and Lilie can think of nothing but going to see their cousin, Winston, who is now a mere 30 minutes away. I don't blame them, those Moores are pretty great.

All three of them are also adjusting to school really, really well. I know I mentioned this in the last post, but seriously, I can't even express what a relief this is for me. I worry so much that we're damaging them by not allowing them to put down roots anywhere, but they are a testament to me that we have all the stability that they need right here within our family. They teach me.

Violet and Clara have watched too much TV the past two months.

Violet and Clara are learning to play really, really well together. It makes my heart happy. Today they are dressed up as a princess and a jack-o-lantern.

Orange is Violet's FAVORITE color. That makes me happy.

Clara doesn't really love clothes. Unless I put her footie pj's on backward (we had to cut all the "footies" off months ago), she wakes up naked, freezing, and in a soggy bed (because she also takes off her diaper) at about 2:30 every morning. Since implementing the "straight-jacket" sleeping method, we've all been much happier.

Violet is getting new glasses sometime this week. I am really hoping that it (again) helps mellow out the melt-downs that are so uncharacteristic of her pleasant, easy-going personality. Winter comes along and she spends lots of time drawing and her eyes get so tired. Her old glasses are too small and hurt her ears, so she doesn't keep them on.

Amid the thousands of wonderful things that I've not recorded in the past year, Violet got her hair cut by her Aunt Genny this last Thanksgiving while we were in Utah. It's adorable and she loves it.

Clara loves to dance. Any music results in a spontaneous dance-party.

Clara is SO SASSY! Many, many unexpected things in her life are met with, "Why you do dat???" One of our last nights in Sandpoint, she was playing chase with Daddy and I scared her as she came flying around a corner. She jumped, squealed, and then immediately said, "Why you scare me, Mom?!!!" We took the girls to see "Frozen" a couple weeks ago and right at the most intense part of the movie, it's silent, and the princess has just turned to ice. Everyone is very sad, of course. Clara yells, "WHY YOU DO DAT, DAD???!!!" It "broke the ice" (haha) and everyone in the theater laughed.

My girls are growing up so much. While I was at our new place with the movers to unpack the truck, Hazel stayed home from school and babysat her three younger sisters for NINE HOURS - and was still smiling when I relieved her at 5:00. I was only a 1/4 mile away and checked on her frequently throughout the day, but she did awesome. I really count on my Hazel. She loves to read, loves to talk, loves to be with other people, and loves learning. She has one of the most pure hearts I've ever known.

Lilie reminds me of myself daily. She loves creating and colors. We had a tour of their new school the Friday before everyone came back from Christmas break and she asked repeatedly about the art class. :) She is an incredible artist. A true introvert, it is so hard to pull information from her about her day and what's on her mind anytime but in the quietest one-on-one moments. She talks plenty and LOUDLY, :) but it's hard to hear what's in her heart without listening. I'm trying to learn how to listen better.

Elsie is such a little people-person. She is loving her new school and LOVES being the "new girl". Her teacher adores her and commented on how wonderfully she's transitioning - as if she's always been part of their class. At her first parent-teacher conference in Sandpoint, her teacher had talked about the possibility of moving her up a grade. She's ready, both intellectually and socially and only misses the cutoff by a month. Nels and I spent a day or two thinking about it and in the end decided that she's right where she needs to be. She is really starting to develop helping others and reaching out to those who may be struggling as a big part of her personal identity. We feel that it's a benefit for her to be older in her class. It thrills my heart to see her take others under her wing so much. She is such a warm person.

This is Elsie with her friend Henry before we left Sandpoint. He was in both her Pre-K class last year and her Kindergarten class this year. To say that he LOVES Elsie would be an understatement.

Nels? He's doing good. He likes his new job and he even gets to come home for lunch on a regular basis. He told me last week that because of security measures, working real late at this job isn't even an option!! Can you believe it?! :) Really, they seem like a great company. And starting today Nels and I are doing another 30 day sugar fast - like we did last January. Gotta get ready for Costa Rica this summer! :)

As for me, I'm really looking forward to the day when I break down the last box. In the meantime, I scheme all day about what I want to do that evening when the kids finally go to bed and I "clock out" for the day . . . so far I haven't been able to actually DO that since we moved in, but I keep hoping.

(my first knitting project - in our temporary apartment - before the boxes and boxes and boxes came)

And most days, since I don't leave the house (and sometimes when I do), I wear something colorfully crazy --- because it makes me happy (and sometimes hides my hair that I haven't washed in three days).

I'll have to remember to pair up that hat with the orange tights, multicolored skirt, and blue slippers I'm wearing today. :)

Ready or Not

It's the third day of school and it's already like we never left.

Dragging to get up and backpacks on the floor. :)

Hazel is in 4th grade this year, Lilie is in 3rd, and Elsie, my tiny girl that has been wanting to go to school for at least 3 years now, is finally starting Kindergarten.

For their first day, I walked each of them to their classroom and met their teachers. Lilie, my little introvert, tried hard to not let the apprehension get the best of her, but when we walked up to her room she couldn't help but shrink behind me and wish for invisibility. I talked to the teacher a moment and then tried to usher her in, but she resisted. Just then, a friend came rushing out the door excited to see her, gave her a big hug, and she immediately relaxed. I assured Mr. P that within 10 minutes you'd never know that she gets nervous. Ever.

Hazel was just ecstatic to be there and barely said goodbye to me as she walked through the door on the arm of one of her friends from last year. It's so crazy to me - I clearly remember being in fourth grade. They all look so tall and these next couple years, big changes are ahead for all of them. I can't believe we are already here.

Elsie was so thrilled. She sat at the table with her name tag and immediately started coloring. I asked her if she was ready for this or if she'd like me to stay with her for a few minutes. She stopped what she was doing, got a very serious thinking-face, and finally said, "I can handle it. You can go." You're sure? "Yep!" I walked from the room with a smile on my face, past the crowd of parents at the door with worry and tears in their eyes.

A few hours later, I pull up to see her leaning against the building looking quite annoyed. I excitedly asked her about her first day of school and she grumpily proceeded to tell me that:

A- she didn't get to go outside for recess. When I justified that it was only the first day, she said, "Well. My teacher said that we'll go outside for recess on special days and today is the first day of school - A SPECIAL DAY - so we should of gone outside today."

B - she didn't get to play with whatever she wanted in the classroom. Again, it's just the first day and I told her that school isn't really about getting to do whatever you want all the time. "Well, they had toys that I wanted to play with and I should be able to play with them."

C - nobody liked her new clothes. "What are you talking about? How do you know that, did someone make fun of you?" She then explained that she'd showed other kids her new shirt and nobody really cared.

LOL! I love my girl. She makes me laugh everyday. I'm sure that she'll have the whole classroom straightened out in no time at all. At home, she makes little picture lists all over her room (since she can't spell all the words yet) - lists for morning, playing, and bedtime routines. This girl is going to have the whole world marching to the beat of her drum by the time she's 9.  ;)

We stopped by the park on the way home in an effort to make up for the disappointment of recess where, within 5 minutes, Elsie bruised her tailbone and got the wind knocked out of her by slipping from the monkey bars and Violet got sand in her eyes. Good grief...

We didn't stay very long.

Yesterday when I picked her up, she was all smiles and had lots of good things to tell me about her morning.

The older girls are loving their classes and are happy to not be riding the bus this year.

With Kindergarten, we are going to be spending a lot of our time driving back and forth to the school, but we are all happy for the return of routine and I pray that's it's an excellent year of learning and growth for my girls. They all soak up knowledge and have so much to give that can bless the lives of others. I'm so pleased with the incredible little women that they are.

Summer Perfection: Part 1

From the get-go, we've always said that Sandpoint was a temporary move. A rest stop on the way to . . . wherever . . . we're going . . . eventually. :)

"Somewhere we'll stay for, I don't know, probably three to five years."

But you know what? I don't know how we'll EVER leave.

Not with weeks like this.

Today as I sat on the beach talking to friends and watching my kids play in the water, sand, and sunshine

I made a decision.

Honey, if things don't work out at Coldwater, we're livin' in a tent! (it can be done! we know a man who does.)

Seriously. How is it that you are not ALL living here with us?!

Clara, at almost 2, is still the sweetest little feisty angel. She holds her own with four older sisters and rolls with the crazy when we stay at the beach for five hours and miss naptime.

Monday she just snuggled right up on my lap mid-afternoon and fell right into dreamland. Holding my sleeping baby is like dreamland for me . . .

Tuesday we skipped the beach and I cleaned my bedroom. A miracle that resulted in the discovery of my keys (missing 10 days) and my glasses (missing 3 months).

Wednesday Nels skipped work and we took the girls to Silverwood. A blast that resulted in the realization that Hazel and Violet don't really love rollercoasters and adrenaline makes me talk a lot.

Dinner at Olive Garden with my beautiful girls, a (yet again) angelically nap-less bebe, 

and their handsome dad.

Today was just summer at it's finest.

Poor Lilie inherited her daddy's pink skin.

diving Elsie

While my angel baby AGAIN slept at the beach, for the first time since we moved here, I went swimming. It was SO FUN!!! Lilie, Hazel, and I swam out to the logs separating the beach and the boats with our friends the McClellands and played King of the Log. It was awesome. I love good friends!

After four hours in the sun, we returned home to pick thimbleberries across the road and golden raspberries in the backyard.

thimbleberries: fuzzy, delicious cousins of domestic raspberries

my "I'm ecstatic that I've not had to water this green grass once this summer" face

my "I'm in heaven" face

Again, I need to ask: how is it that you are all not living here WITH US?!

On the Mend

That last post cracks me up!

I was so frustrated and SO mad. It was one of those weird days.

Then I spent Friday and Saturday sick in bed. It was sad. See?

very pathetic and pitiful.

But I did get to listen to almost the entire book of "Unbroken" and Nels was an amazing Mr. Mom on Saturday. That wonderful man washed and folded ALL the laundry! I should get sick more often.

In other news, some good things:

• We hung up Nels's hammock last night in the backyard. Hello, old friend! We haven't enjoyed one another's company for nearly two years. You were missed. Welcome to paradise!
• I love riding lawn mowers. - Unless I'm drugged on Benadryl. Then they lull me to sleep. A summer job discovery. Ever since, I lay off the drugs when I'm mowin'.
• I can see the floor in my van. The WHOLE floor. It's a miracle.
• Nels played catch with me yesterday. Makes me SO happy. and sweaty. I played varsity softball when I was a Freshman, then we moved to Bountiful when I was a Sophomore and I never tried out for the team because I was too intimidated. Another true story.
• Lilie has a great eye and is an excellent batter.
• Violet loves kickball! When Daddy played with the girls the other day, she was the only one he could keep interested. I think we're going to have to give it another go.
• Clara hates her snipped-off binkies and tells me off every time I give it to her. She, too, LOVES the riding lawn mower. She has become the tantrum queen. She is also a champion sleeper.
• Elsie needs a break from technology. :) The other day she was playing "Dinosaur Train" and after regaling me with "facts" like, "Mom, did you know that dinosaurs lived in outerspace?!" (I think there may have been a slight misunderstanding there) exclaimed, "I love information!" Trips to the non-fiction section of the library are forthcoming.
• Hazel and the hammock are going to clock a lot of hours in this summer. That girl loves to read. She's burned through almost the entire Percy Jackson series (along with many other books) in the last couple of months. 
• Three more weeks of school! - Then I'm toying with the idea of going AWOL for the entire month of June.

Tomato Mountain

Our backyard.

Yeah. It's rough. I know.

I got a wild hair last week and decided to actually follow through on something I'd told my kids we could do! It's kind of a novel idea for me, but it was so much fun we may do it again in the future.

Hazel and I were browsing Pinterest one afternoon when we came across a really cute and earthy idea for a wreath. We loved it. I pinned it. Then we decided to get started on it right away. (An almost unheard of experience at our house! I can assure you....my poor kids.)

Since moving up here, every time we go out I admire the beautiful mosses growing on everything. They are so green and lush and lovely and I LOVE all the different shades. I knew that we could find more than enough for our project in the backyard (and in the neighbor's backyard, but shhhh! don't tell!), so we set out with our basket in hand -- admiring the the misty mountain (hop!) along the way.

I won't tell you the story about another time I couldn't keep my mouth shut and trotted myself down the road to confronted our backyard neighbor about the condition of that horse. She looked so pretty standing there watching us. Just so perfectly beautiful!

We ventured into the woods, picking moss, enjoying the cedars and the birch trees and finding lots of hidden treasures on the way - a perfect little creek, lots of wacky fungi, and three deer.

And some really delightful children! Violet doesn't like the scary, dark trees, but she let me give her a piggy-back ride and got down enough to stomp in some puddles.

These girls make my heart overflow with love. They are so perfect!

Our haul was pretty good! We got tons of lovely textures and colors and it was so fun to see my little women get so excited over picking a big piece of moss with no tears. :)

I was feeling extra grateful to have this girl with me and feeling well enough to go tromping through the trees with me! She is always such a big help and such a sweet friend to spend the day with. I'm so lucky!

That night we let the moss dry, but the next day when Lilie got home from school, we glued all those pretty carpets onto our wreath form and even added some little friends to greet our visitors.

I love it so much that I almost want to put in on the inside of the door. :) 

Also, I learned that I am not great at tying bows. The resulting shenanigans with that one almost drove me to drink, but turned out pleasing - after I had about a cup of red glitter in my lap.

Another thing we did last week was get our Christmas tree! There is a Christmas tree farm just down the road from us and since Hazel wasn't quite up to a full-blown mountain experience, we decided to go there rather than head for the hills to cut our own. 

It turned out so pretty!

I was able to finish up the last two stockings while watching Animal Planet at the hospital. They make my heart happy.

All in all, it was a successful week. Filled with a few projects and lots of healing!

Now on to this week - which will be defined by the number of loads of laundry that actually get folded and put away!

Gosh, my life of servitude it hard!

P.S. The title of this post is coined from Violet. She calls the mountain we live on Tomato Mountain. The girls have even made up a song about it. It makes me laugh. Much. Tomato Mountain! Oh, YES! Tomato Mountain . . .