Clara Lettice Chick

My sweet little Clara is here and we are so, so happy. She is very alert, chubby, fuzzy, and has lots of beautiful brown hair.

Clara Lettice Chick

September 2, 2011

6:35 A.M.

9 lbs. 1 oz.

21 3/4 in.

Throughout this last month of pregnancy, as I've recorded several times, I'd had a lot of contractions. A week and a half ago when we went into the Birth Center, believing that the baby would be born that night (and then wasn't), the midwife said that I was completely effaced and she guessed that once I actually went into active labor, it would be very quick.

I continued to have off and on contractions throughout the next week. Mostly on. Last Monday night they started coming irregularly (anywhere from 4 to 13 minutes apart) and lasted for the next THREE days! Walking and everything else I did, didn't really speed them up or help regulate them and I was getting tired and frustrated. By Wednesday afternoon I called my midwife to ask for some insight or help. She told me to come in Thursday morning to the Birth Center and she would check to see how far along I was and give me some herbs that would help.

Thursday morning came and I was feeling very hopeful. It seemed that the baby had moved down even further and I had several appointments to keep me occupied and busy that day. As I was getting ready to head up to her office, she called to let me know that they currently had two other women potentially in labor and she just couldn't bring me in and intentionally induce active labor at that time. We would try again the next morning.

WAhhhh-ha-ha-ha!

I was sad. And I felt like this baby was never coming out. :) I really hate getting to this point in pregnancy. I hate knowing that I am acting like an idiot -- recognizing it -- and still feeling entirely the same. Having lost all willpower to control my emotions and thoughts. I was starting to be convinced that my body didn't know what it was doing and just wouldn't go into labor on it's own. --- Or that once it did, I'd be over my due date and getting ever closer to Nels leaving and starting work in Sandpoint.

The day finally ended and I went to sleep that night exhausted - knowing that I would be back up at 3:00 in the morning for my nightly ritual of having contractions on top of a full bladder, waking up, using the bathroom, and then not being able to fall back asleep before the same thing happened again.

Well, I did wake up just before 3:00. I used the bathroom and lay back down. A bit later, a REAL contraction came on. A good, hard, deep wave of a contraction that you don't sleep through. Nine minutes later, there was another one. During the contraction, I thought, maybe I should wake Nels, but then it was over and I decided I should just time them for a little while. Nine minutes later, at about 3:45, I changed my mind and we were both up. As soon as I stood up, they started coming closer together, but I still really didn't want to jump the gun - having already done that once before. So we slowly got dressed. Nels kept asking me what we needed, but I was so distracted within myself that I couldn't give him any clear direction. Poor boy. :)

I think I only had another two contractions before I decided that I should really call my midwife and my friend, Stefanie (to come over AGAIN to be with the kids). Michelle (midwife) grilled me on how close together the contractions were, but because I'd really not had that many, I couldn't give her much information. She made a few phone calls to set things up and called me back with instructions to meet her at the Birth Center in half an hour. Even in the small amount of time between me calling her and Michelle calling me back, the contractions had become closer together - ranging between 2 1/2 to 5 minutes. Between contractions, I kept worrying that I was rushing things again, maybe I shouldn't go in yet . . . but then another would come and remind me that we shouldn't be hanging out at home any longer. Bless Stefanie for sleeping with her phone next to her bed and being willing to come over at a moment's notice.

We arrived in Rigby at about 5:15 in the morning. The contractions were good and real, but I still had yet to really relax into any of them, having an underlying feeling that once I did, this baby was going to be here fast. Once getting there and getting set up, there was both relief to know that I could now actively encourage this little baby into the world and also a lot of apprehension. Having done this before, only 18 months ago, I remembered what was coming and I'm not going to lie and say that I wasn't scared. :)

But, trusting in the process, relax into them I did and it WAS fast.

I find labor really interesting. I find that who I AM during labor is really interesting. Some women love having lots of touching and support. Lots of encouragement. I am just not like that. And I'm glad that Nels is okay with me retreating into myself. It was really nice that once we got there, Michelle just kind of gave me my space and Nels laid down on the bed and everyone kind of just left me alone.

I walked around the room for a while, trying to decide if it was more productive for me to be on my feet or if I should go sit in the tub and just concentrate on the contractions. Eventually the lure of nice, hot water and not having to use all my other muscles to hold myself up won out and I got in the tub. I wish there'd been a clock handy, just for my own curiosity of how quickly things moved from then -- time seems to lose all meaning during labor -- but there weren't more than a few contractions in the tub before everything changed again and I could hear Michelle whisper to Nels that it wouldn't be much longer.

When it was time to push, I thought there was no way that what I could feel needed to happen, was actually going to happen. It is just the strangest thing to get to a point where you cannot describe how intense and uncomfortable you are and you know that the only way to get out of it, is to intentionally cause yourself more pain.

Right then both mine and Nels's alarms went off on our phones - letting us know that it was 6:30. :) Time to get the kids up for school. :) And I remember seeing through the window that the sun was just coming up. Little Clara came into the world quickly, but it was a LOT of work and even as I was doing it, I was yelling that I didn't want to do this. :) I remember with Violet, once her head was born, it seemed like the rest was just smooth sailing, but Clara was just . . . a lot of work.

In just over three hours from when the first contraction came, my little Clara was born and as soon as she was, I cuddled her up to me and admired our beautiful little baby -- with Nels just over my shoulder. She was healthy and perfect in every single way and Michelle kept saying what a big baby she was. -- But she didn't look very big to me. Just pink and beautiful. Everything was so calm and good. I don't know why I remember, but the song "Yellow" by Coldplay was playing. One of my favorite songs of all time. We took about half an hour to just sit there and hold our sweet little baby.

We got all cleaned up and once they finally weighed that little girl, she was 9 lbs. 1 oz!! My biggest baby by a pound and a half!!! No wonder pushing was harder with her than with Violet. :) She was also 21 3/4 inches! Such a cute little chububba! :)

Michelle and Me

We settled into bed, called our families, and fell asleep for a few hours -- long enough for Michelle to monitor that both Clara and I were stable and doing well -- and then mid-afternoon, we went home. It was perfect. So nice to come home to my own bed and my own shower. :)

It was just such a beautiful day.

I know a lot of people wouldn't want to do an out-of-hospital birth. I know a lot of people wouldn't want to do a natural birth. But for me, it's worked out to be such an incredible experience. I love feeling like . . . my body is doing what it was made to do. I love the process. I love the power that comes from doing something that seems beyond my ability to accomplish and coming out whole on the other side. There is truly a one-ness with God that comes as you hang that realm where this life and the next are threaded together. It's just really beautiful to me.

I'm just so thankful to be a mother.

Naught

As I read over the past few posts I've had here --- well, for weeks and weeks --- I can't help but notice how boring and whiney I am. Ick. I hate that.

Oh well. You get what you get and you don't throw a fit. This is just me right now. Preoccupied and annoying.

Thankfully, I still have so many sweet friends that love me so much --- regardless. Many of you, through your loving words of encouragement, have been an enormous boost and so many who live close have been there to help me out and serve me in ways that I will never, NEVER be able to repay. I am overwhelmed with gratitude. I am so blessed.

Wednesday, Nels and I celebrated our anniversary. My sweet friend, Hannah, fed our girls dinner and then brought them back home and put them all to sleep! We didn't do anything too fancy, but we went to dinner and a movie. It was really nice to have a night alone. Nels said, "This is like a Parents' Anniversary." :) Yep. Pretty low key.

However, during dinner and throughout the movie, I started having pretty regular contractions. They continued through the night - waking me up a couple of times. The next morning, they were still there and I had them all throughout the day. By evening, they were good and hard - - but a little irregular. We got the girls to bed and my friend, Stefanie, came over with her new little baby to be with our girls while Nels and I ran some errands and then went down to the river to walk for a while.

When I called my midwife at about 11:00 pm, contractions were good and regular - about 3 to 5 minutes apart - and lasting about 45 to 60 seconds a piece. She said to come on into the birth center. We were so excited!

We got there and set up - contractions still coming strong and regular. Not too intense, but we were worried that after about 30 hours of regular contractions, things may move pretty quick. However, after being there for a while, things started to actually slow down and by 3:00 in the morning, they were almost completely stopped. 32 hours of contractions - just to have them peter out.

I felt so bad to have gotten everybody there, just to have things stop.

With all of my other labors, the doctor or midwife has broken my water. At that point, things progress quickly and regularly. So I almost felt like my body didn't know what it was doing. Almost like it was waiting for somebody else to get things moving. So frustrating.

I finally lay down next to Nels and just slept until about 6:00 am, when we packed everything back up and went back home. My midwife assured me over and over again that this happens all the time and to not feel bad. But there was really no getting over that as I apologized to the three women who had spent the night at the birth center and as I came home to Stefanie, who had spent the whole night taking care of my kids - and also taking care of her own newborn baby - at my house.

And all for nothing.

As I've written several times over the past month or so, if there is anything that I hate more than waiting, it's being disappointed. Yesterday I got a healthy dose of both.

It would be a huge underestimation to say that I spent most of the day feeling a little depressed.

However, Nels stayed home from work and let me sleep much of the day away. (I was SO tired!)  Hannah called mid-morning asking if I would LET her take my girls with her and her two kids to the lake. I took myself out for a pedicure while Nels took a nap with Violet. And then Hannah called again telling us that she was bringing over dinner and asking if the girls could come over to her house for a sleepover. After she'd taken them to the lake all day!!!

Between Nels, Stefanie, and Hannah - I couldn't have felt more loved. I am truly blessed with such wonderful people in my life.

Last night, as I knelt in prayer and cried for a while, I was reminded that faith is a choice.

I've felt so frustrated at times over the past month. The house isn't sold. The baby isn't born. And I have NO control over either.

I was SO genuinely excited with the prospect of getting to hold this tiny little baby in my arms and bring her into our family -- but I would be remiss if I didn't admit that there is a small portion of me that was just excited to be able to focus on something other than the house. It felt so good.

To have it all come to naught was really crushing for me.

For the first time in my life I feel like I am coming to perhaps understand the passage in Mark where a father brings his possessed son to Jesus - asking him if he can help them at all.

23 Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are^apossible to him that ^bbelieveth.

 24 And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, Lord, I believe; help thou mine ^aunbelief.

It's always felt like such a strange statement. "I believe; help thou mine unbelief." But over the past month, I've come to understand, in my own way, that there is a way to believe and to hope, but still have a hard time believing.

I believe that the Lord is aware of me and my family. I believe that he will help us. But sometimes I have a hard time believing that things will be the way that I hope. I want to have faith, and I do, but somehow there is still fear.

But last night, as I said, I was reminded that faith is a choice -- that I will make. I will choose to have faith. And I will ask the Lord to please help me with my unbelief. And today was a brighter day.

Pregnancy Blob

I love that I've been at this stage in pregnancy twice before on this blob. :) I think it's really humorous to read what a crazy woman I was with both of them. Weirdo. Freakazoid. That's me. Then. Not now. I'm never like that anymore all the time.

In all seriousness, I do feel a little bit better, just because my list of "to-do's" is ten miles long.

Yesterday I was just uncomfortable. This little bebe has been sitting up muy, muy higher than previous kiddos. I felt like I hadn't taken a deep breath in a long time and I couldn't eat a decent meal without feeling like it was coming out my nose. I was also really tired - which I attribute to having a yucky chest and head cold.

As the evening was coming on, I sat on the couch next to Nels - only to immediately become a bouncy ball/jungle gym for a one year old. My little Tornado brought with her a boop (yes. boop. what do you call it?) called "Hooray for Fish!" Very cute. If you've never read it. We sat reading it over and over again for about half an hour before she got bored. As I stood up, I breathed for the first time in months! and the muscles at the top of my abdomen weren't cramped and straining! This little lady had "dropped". Something that hasn't happened with my last three kids until I was ready to start into labor.

Cool. I think.

From then until about 4 in the morning, I had nice, pretty regular contractions. I got a few things ready (just in case) and then tried to sleep - unproductively. This morning I finally got up and then had a few more contractions that kind of just petered out throughout the morning.

The same thing that happened with Violet. For several days.

{Sigh.}

I had an appointment with my midwife this morning. She said that her body did that with all of her last three babies (5, 6, and 7) and each time, it did it for longer. Just your body getting ready. Thinning and whatnot.

Violet lasted about 3 nights of doing this fun little number. (Before my midwife broke my water.) How long is this baby going to be? Five? Seven? Fourteen?? Just enough that we can't go up to Sandpoint before the baby is born and look at houses like we'd planned? yeah. Probably. ('Cause guess what? The midwife I have now? She's not going to break my water. No matter how much of an exhausted idiot I turn into.)

I'm still almost three weeks from my due date. I have no problem with her waiting until later. But I'm afraid that she's just going to tease me for the week or so --- making it so that we can't make any other plans.

I've had lots of feelings lately. Feelings like - the house is going to sell - or - this baby isn't going to wait until my mom gets back from Haiti before arriving. Feeling that all is right and going to be okay. But then again. I second guess myself. Because you know what? In between those brief moments of I don't know what - peace? delusion? I don't know that I feel anything. I think I've just felt too much over the past month. Too many feelings taking a toll on me and my emotions are just shutting down.

I feel nothing.

'Cause I've already felt everything.

And now I'm just tired.

I don't know what the coming month is going to bring. Everything will work out. Work out like I "feel"? Maybe not. But I hope. And that's pretty good.

So do you want to play a guessing game with me? When do you think this baby will come? I'm due on the 5th of September. 19 days away and this baby has definitely dropped already.

Hazel was 10 days early. Lilie was 14. Elsie was 7 and Violet was only 2 days early. I'm usually early, but that's about all that can be said for consistency. Go on. Take a guess. I'll send the winner a prize! And I like good prizes.

So humor me.

What's your guess? Three days? Three weeks? Let's hear it.

Making Histories

I just have to share how amazed I am.

In the LDS church, we care a lot about family history. We believe that the prophecies made in Malachi are being fulfilled -- that the prophet Elijah has come and restored the sealing keys. - Or the authority to bind in heaven that which is bound on Earth. - Like eternal marriage, with spouses and children all belonging with one another forever. Malachi says that when Elijah comes he will turn "the heart of the fathers to the children, and the children to the fathers". As Latter-day Saints, we often call this the "Spirit of Elijah".

It sounds very vague, but as I've delved into family history work at times of my life, I have FELT this Spirit come to me. To a point that the work of finding these ancestors can be quite "addicting" (for lack of a better word :). Where I think about these people, I yearn after them, and I can almost feel who they are. And I KNOW they want to be found.

Six years ago, I took a Family History class at BYU-Idaho. It was a wonderful class where I had an opportunity to learn the different programs that the Church has. It was awesome. I put together an extensive "tree" of my ancestors. Most all of my family lines can be traced back to the early days of the Church -- and therefore, much of the work in finding people for many generations back has already been done. (Don't get me wrong, I'm WELL AWARE that there is still LOTS more to do, Mom. :)

As a result, I started looking into some of Nels's history. There's been a lot of work done on some of his lines, but the "Chick" side of his family has been harder to track down much past the family that originally joined the Church in England and then immigrated to Utah. After I finished my class at BYU-I, I started doing some research on that line in earnest. I found bits and pieces -- exciting things -- but as life got busy, I didn't have time to "finish" and shut it away. -- Where I've been sitting on it for five years.

~~~~~~

As I've been pregnant with this baby, I have felt a lot of anxiety about what this little lady's name is to be. It's been strange, because I can't even remember hardly thinking about that at all until my last trimester with my other girls -- and even then, we still didn't really "settle" on anything until the baby was actually born. BUT this baby? She wants to have a name. There has been some sort of importance tied up with her name. I've even gone so far as to mostly settle on a name, only to lose sleep over it. Waking up in the wee hours of the morning for a week, feeling anxiety about it!

Just so you know, she does NOT want to be named Pearl. :)

However, one name has played in the back of both Nels' and my mind since before Violet was born. When I decided that her name was NOT to be Pearl, that's the only name that I could think of -- and I haven't lost another wink of sleep over it since. :)

I've also been trying to decide on a middle name - knowing that I wanted to find a family name, preferably from the "Chick side". The name that has come to me over and over again is Lettice --- Nels's g-g-g-g-grandmother that I found in all of my searching five years ago. I have thought of her often over that time.

Today, I just couldn't stand it anymore. I pulled out my binder and started recording all that information that I'd gathered years ago. - So that even if I don't have the time to do all the leg work right now, at least the information will be there for someone else to work on it.

I genuinely believe that part of the reason that I've been feeling so much stress over the name of this baby is so that I will get this work done. I know it sounds weird, but I believe that those that have passed on want to be found and that they can find "creative" ways of helping us do just that. :)

I also found something else that is very cool. The name for this baby. --- The one that feels good and doesn't keep me up at night. --- I found today that it is also the name of Nels's great grandmother. How awesome.

The Skinny

I get tired. I'm really sorry.

I can't seem to stay on top of everything - anything. I'm hoping to climb out from under this rock soon - as the weather warms and my children spend more hours in the great outside. Working around the house is tiring, taking the kids out for fun days is even more tiring. Today was a fun day. And a working day.

Updating will happen someDAY. At night time. I'm sorry. I get tired.

Chicks make CHICKS!

Can you believe it? FIVE girls! We are going to have a whole lot of fun at our house. I tell you what. Lots of emotions, lots of silly fights, and lots of love.

I was raised in a family with four girls (and two brothers) and while we didn't always get along, I sure love my sisters. They are some of the very best friends that I have.

I am a little overwhelmed at the responsibility that is placed upon me as their mother. I think that the identity of women has been hugely distorted in our world today and I'm so amazed at the faith that the Lord has placed in me to show them how to be daughters of God. Or maybe more correctly, to guide them back to Him, so that He can teach them who they already are. How to be examples to the girls and women around them. To live with faith, integrity, strength, peace, and joy. To raise them with a desire to be mothers themselves. To have families and to serve the Lord. To seek after righteousness. To discover the divinity within themselves.

I am so excited for this new little lady to come. (But I have no problem waiting until September! :) I know many people who say things like: Oh, girls are so much calmer (or easier or harder) than boys! or Girls are so much easier to potty train! or any hundreds of other things that they have observed in their own families of "mixed gender" children. LOL! However, I can tell you right now, that each child comes with their own distinct personality -- quite regardless of girl or boy. Some of my girls are calmer than others. Some have been eternally easier to potty train than others. Some like pink. Some like blue. Some like princesses. Some like dragons. Some like robot-princess-dragon-ballerinas. :) Some like to sit still for hours, working at the same thing. Others lose interest in a matter of seconds and are always on the move. The ONLY (usually true) "gender absolute" that I have found in my last seven years of parenting all girls is this: girls are much more likely to deal with conflict in an emotion-based way, while boys seem much more prone to deal with it in a physical way. - But even that has its exceptions. :) I have found that each of them is entirely unique and I've never made two the same. -- Never even made two opposites! They all seem to come from entirely different planets all together. :) And I am so excited to meet this new "different" little person.

I absolutely love the variety of our seemingly-imbalanced family!

"If you don’t understand how a woman could both love her sister dearly and want to wring her neck at the same time, then you were probably an only child." ~ Linda Sunshine

Friday's Fabulous Five

1. It's supposed to be sunny and in the 60's today!! Oh my, that sounds like heaven. It will probably also be windy, but I'll take the warmer weather in whatever form today! - Might even take the kids to the nursery, just for funsies. There's not a whole lot that we can plant in Idaho this time of year still, but . . . a girl can dream, right? :)

2. I've been able to feel this baby move for a couple of weeks now. It's only occasional and easy to miss, but still there. It's nice to know that there's really a little person in there and I'm not just getting chubby. :)

3. It's April Fool's Day. Is that good? I don't know. The "holiday" has never meant much to me, but it does signify the beginning of my birthday month. The beginning of a really busy month. The beginning of hopefully a warmer month. Plus, Hazel has been talking about April Fool's for months . . . she's not much of a natural jokester, :) so maybe I'll have to break out of my boring mom role and find some fun things for her to plan for Daddy this evening. :)

4. Violet has been doing awesome at going to sleep with no binky since those first two times. She is a model baby. The only problem that we've had is her waking up at about 5:45 this morning. - Normally, we would get her a binky and she'd be back out, but this morning didn't work quite like that and neither Nels nor I got much sleep for the rest of the morning. Nels, because I asked him to take care of her (when really I should have just let her cry it out) and me, because I couldn't fall back asleep with her screaming and Nels getting frustrated in the other room. I think both of us were left feeling like we'd been cheated (April Fool's!) by the time seven rolled around and it was time to get Lilie up for school.

Oh man, that doesn't sound fabulous, does it? (Okay, I'm kind of having a hard time coming up with fabulous this morning, having gone to bed with a migraine and then getting 'joked' out of my last hour and a half of sleep.) What I was trying to say before my bad mood got in the way is that Violet is a champ and I really hope that she continues to be good for us as we work out any kinks. :) And she'd better take one really great nap today.

5. Okay, this one really is fabulous. This has been the first week of Hazel's two week Spring Break. Lilie's week off begins today at 11:15. Often times during the week -- especially on those days that Lilie is out of school for 'teacher training' or some-such, she and Elsie fight all day. Beginning with the moment that they see one another and continuing until well after I'm yelling as much as they are. Two incredibly strong-willed girls (with a stupid mother). They are two of a kind and often that is some kind of monster (with a monster mother). (Sounds fabulous already, huh?)

Needless to say, I had been dreading the weeks of Spring Break. Dreading the addition of another sister to the daily mix of fighting nutsies.

However, to my surprise, this week has actually been happy (for the most part). -- In fact, the only real arguing that Hazel has engaged in has generally been with me alone. :) -- I've found that Hazel's sweet and inclusive personality has actually helped tame the tension between the other two, leaving most days with three sisters playing happily together. Hazel is so good at rallying everyone to one game and does her best (most of the time) to make sure everyone is having fun. She is like a buffer between two very strongly reactive chemical sisters. (Do you miss Chemistry? sometimes I do. :) Hazel is happy. Hazel is kind. Hazel never wants to be mean or disobedient. Hazel is just good, through and through. Hazel goes about singing or humming or making happy 'sounds' most of the day. :) Hazel believes life should be fair (which is usually the source of argument with her parents). Hazel is very strong-willed in her own right, but usually that doesn't come in conflict with her sisters. For some reason known only to the Cosmos, both her sisters are usually quite compliant to letting her have her way. Hazel is honest, loving, and very helpful. I'm so thankful for the sweet influence that she adds to our . . . stubborn, explosive, determined home.

An Update: Short and Sweet . . . yeah, right.

I've been wasting time browsing around blogs and facebook for about an hour now. Trying to break away to complete the list of "to-do's" piling up, but REALLY I just want to write. So I'm going to do it. I'm going to give you a condensed (well, probably not) run-down of the laundry list of randomness that's been in the spin-cycle of my brain for the last few days.


first.
We're weaning Violet off her binky. --- I knew there was a reason why I preferred to do this at four months. The last two bedtimes have just been painful. But I am NOT going to keep crawling around on the floor in the middle of the night to find a binky so she can go back to bed. --- Especially since my expanding belly is making that increasingly uncomfortable. And I am NOT going to have two babies in my house using binkies, ya know?


second.
I went to Parent Teacher Conference with Lilie's teacher this morning. Lilie is amazing. Here are a few things her teacher loves about her.

Lilie is incredibly creative and artistic.

Lilie is a friend to everyone, very kind and inclusive. She takes others under her "wing" so to speak, and helps them feel a part of the group.

Lilie is always thinking. Her teacher says that she feels like she can literally see the wheels in Lilie's head turning. Thinking, thinking, thinking. 

Lilie is almost always happy, happy, happy. Very confident, very self-assured.

Lilie is very smart and has had no problem with any of her work. Mrs. Ball has moved her up to the first grade reading level, along with one other girl in her class. She loves learning and loves school.

The only problem that she mentioned with Lilie at all, is that sometimes she doesn't pay attention to what is going on, because she is caught up with whatever is going on in her head. :) Mrs. Ball said that it is probably just because Lilie gets a little bit bored sometimes with the Kindergarten curriculum.

I love my Lilie. None of the things that her teacher told me were really new or surprising, but it's nice to hear such positive feedback about my little wild girl from someone else. :) Lilie is so wonderful. She loves learning and she loves school. It is such a joy to be her mother.

third.
This pregnancy, that I am now . . . 17 weeks into (wow!) . . . has been really emotional for me. And guess what? I don't even really know why. To answer the shock/surprise/incredulity of, I'm sure, many of you --- yes. This baby was planned and we are WAY excited. But, FIVE! Holy smokes?! Can you believe that we are going to have FIVE kids???!!! (That's one little piece of the emotion.) I'm only going to be 29 and have five children . . . . . . . . . FIVE? I'm not even 29 YET! (That's a second piece.) Also, I feel like I'm entering a new phase of life . . . the one where I have five(!!!!) kids and I'm going to turn thirty and I'm getting to a point where covering up grey hair is a real problem (and I'm not talking about like, 4 hairs here gals. I know some of you that are complaining about four or five --- that's NOT what I'm talking about). I'm entering a phase where I can remember my mom at this age. I can remember my mom and I can remember being 18 and thinking that 29, 30 was really . . . old? mature? I don't know. All I DO know is that I wasn't expecting to get HERE and really feel like I'm still 18 years old. (Enter pieces three, four, five (FIVE?!), and a million.)

I am stoked about adding another little person to our family. I know that this is the right thing. I'm SO happy with where we are in our lives right now. I LOVE having my kids as close as they are. But at the same time .  . . how the heck did we get here???!! I'm just having one of those step-out-of-myself moments where it feels like I'm kind of removed from my life, looking in from a distance and trying to figure out how I got here. It happens to me on occasion. We're going along, taking life a day at a time, when BAM! I realize that my kids just got years older right before my eyes . . . only this moment is not lasting for like a day or a week, it's lasting for months and it's really weird.

fourth.
I don't really know if I want to tell ANYONE the gender of this baby before it arrives. After having four girls, I can tell you now, people say some idiotic things about the gender of your children when you have multiples of one gender. And I feel like for at least my last two babies, people have been actually DISAPPOINTED when I tell them that we're having a girl. (And for those of you who can't follow what I'm rambling about here, no. I don't know what THIS CURRENT baby is yet.)

With both Elsie and Violet, I repeatedly got this reaction to our announcing the gender of my baby. "Ohhhh . . . . . . . . really? Well . . . you're going to have more kids, right?" or "I'm sorry . . . well, at least it will be cheaper!" 

I am so sick of people only getting excited if we were going to have a boy! And I am so sick of stupid people's comments! I don't want people's condolences if we have another girl and I don't want people's OVER excitement if we're having a boy.

I would be thrilled to have a boy, and I am thrilled if this little baby is a girl too! I'm so excited for whatever little person is going to be joining our family, because either way, we certainly don't make them dull! :)  . . . . . we'll just have to wait and see if I let you all be excited with us or not (on Monday!), when we find out or if I make you all wait another 5 months!! :) Rude, huh?

fifth.
oh. my. goodness. FIVE?! AHHH! ha ha ha ha ha! we're nuts!!! I love it!

Violet Emily Chick

Violet Emily Chick

March 9, 2010 - 5:27pm

7 lbs. 8 oz.

19 3/4 in.

Our little Violet finally decided to make her debut in the world this last Tuesday and we are all SO EXCITED!!! She is beautiful and healthy and LOVED. She's got a fuzzy head of dark blonde hair and fuzz just about everywhere else too! :) On her back, her ears, her cheeks . . . so cute and soft.

I'd been having contractions -- for weeks :) -- but all weekend particularly. When I went in to my midwife appointment on Monday, I was dilated to 3 cm -- a huge improvement over the week before -- and my midwife asked if I wanted to have my membranes stripped -- to see if that helped move things along. Of course I did and then had nice, hard, regular contractions throughout the remainder of the day. However, as the night wore on and we were getting the girls to bed and preparing to mobilize the troops and go to the hospital, they slowed down considerably. By about 10, they were about 7-10 minutes apart and not nearly as hard as they'd been earlier. Exhausted and frustrated I finally went to bed, with contractions remaining at about that consistency throughout the night.

Needless to say, the next morning, I was TIRED and . . . irritable (read Sleep-Deprived Maniac). I called my sweet mother to cry for a while and then got on with the day, continuing to have less than promising contractions. Finally around 11:30 I called my midwife again to ask her what she would be willing to do for me. :) I'd wanted to go natural with this baby, but was afraid that if I continued along the road I was presently on, by the time I actually went into "real" labor I would be so exhausted I'd not be able to go through with it. Sweet woman that she is, she told me that if I had dilated to at least a 4 in the last 24 hours (which was very likely), she'd break my water for me and admit me to the hospital. She said to bring Nels and my bag and just plan on staying. HALLELUJAH! My mom arrived to stay with my girls and we were off.

We arrived at Helene's office around 2:30, she broke my water at about 3:00, and we were admitted and in a room at the hospital by 4:00 with instructions to call her as soon as I felt like I needed her help. Contractions were hurting quite a bit by this point, but I didn't want to jump the gun, so I decided to go sit in the hospital's jacuzzi tub for a while before calling. :) It felt wonderful, but I still spent the next hour or so trying to "be in the zone" - or something. :) Mostly trying to listen to my body, zone Nels out, and trying to not want to kill the nurse every time she'd peek her head in to ask me another question or want to check the baby's heart rate again, right in the middle of another contraction. All the while, wondering if I was making the right decision and could I really do this. Nels assured me (when I wasn't telling him to be quiet :) that I could, that I already was doing it, and that if I decided not to, he was absolutely fine with that. **He's such a wonderful husband.** 

After about an hour, I came to a point where I felt like every time I twitched a muscle, I was having another unbearable contraction, with no breathing room in between. I was exhausted. I concluded that I, in fact, could NOT continue to do this and I didn't need to. I was going to get an epidural and go to sleep --- if only I could get out of that darn tub without ripping into a million little pieces in the process. LOL! After what felt like one long, unbearable contraction all the way from the jacuzzi to my room, we made it. We were followed in by my midwives, who'd just gotten there. After another contraction, I turned around to greet them and told them that I didn't want to do this anymore -- I didn't think I could. Helene smiled sweetly and said, "That just fine. Let's see how far along you are." In the time that it took us to have this two sentence conversation, I started having another contraction and realized that I knew EXACTLY how far along I was! Just kidding about the epidural, I think she's coming RIGHT NOW! Three or four pushed later, our little Violet was welcomed into this world by a STUNNED mother and a SHOCKED father. LOL! Thank goodness Helene and Karen hadn't waited until I called them!!

I just couldn't believe that I did it! And the midwives told my dear friend who had an appointment with them the following day, that the look on Nels's face was priceless. :) It was just SO FAST! None of my labors have been long ones, but this one was definitely a very different experience. :) Nels asked me about half an hour after she'd been born if I'd do it this way again. I told him that my opinion at the moment was more than a little jaded and to not ask such questions for about six months. :) However I can say, even three days later, that I would absolutely do it this way again. It was such an incredible, empowering experience. Intense and painful and like nothing else on the planet - but one that I will never, ever forget. The only thing that I would have done differently is to have had the sense to call my midwife earlier, so that she could help me understand better what exactly my body was doing. That during that period of "every muscle twitch is causing me to have another contraction" - it actually meant that I was pretty much done. :) She told me afterward that generally by the time women (who have had more than one baby) get to the point that they think they can't do it and want drugs, they are already done and ready to push. :)

I am so thankful for my sweet Nels. He was there for me just as I needed him to be - even when I was telling him to be quiet or to stop touching me or to stop making me laugh. :) He is my best friend and confidant in every way. I'm so thankful to have been blessed to bring another child into this world with him at my side. FOUR KIDS!!! Holy cow. We are not a "little" family anymore!

Isn't she so beautiful?! We love our little Violet!

Baby, It's Cold Outside

In an effort to encourage this little baby here, we took a little family stroll in the cold and grey. Unfortunately, frigid Idaho afternoons don't aren't very enticing. :)

IF MAMA AIN'T HAPPY, AIN'T NOBODY HAPPY

Wow. My three hundredth post. I have had a lot to say in two and a half years!

----------------------------------------------

I sat down last night to write a post. My three hundredth. The past few days had been such . . . inconsistent ones, that I decided I needed to think about the things that I'm grateful for. However, as I sat in front of my computer, trying to feel grateful, I was having a really hard time. Nels and the girls came into my room, ready for prayer before getting in bed. I knelt down and among the fiasco that is family prayer at our house, I totally lost it. Sorely tempted to grab my keys and leave the house. I got myself under "control" and helped him finish getting the girls in bed. For the remainder of the night Nels kept asking me if I was okay. (Of course I'm fine! Why would you think any different???!) Needless to say, I never quite felt like coming back to my "grateful post". Another thing that obviously doesn't need to be pointed out, but I will anyway, is that hormones, excessive sugar, lack of sleep, and anxiety don't really bode well for anyone in our house.

This morning I woke up to sun shining through my bedroom window. Not the gloomy kind of sun that is shrouded by grey clouds, but bright, cheery, yellow sunshine. As I held the door open for Hazel and Nels as they left for work and school, I could see the little green tips of my daffodils, just starting to push their way to the surface, through the snow still covering my flower beds. And I felt like singing. And I did. And I cleaned the kitchen floor. On my hands and knees - doing a good job of it for the first time in months. :) (Don't think that I don't clean my kitchen floor regularly. With three children, that would be disgusting. But I usually use a mop.) (Also, please don't give me any well-meaning encouragement about nesting -- I've been "nesting" for more than a month now. My floor was just really dirty and I was feeling up to it this morning. :) Even though the yellow sunshine is no longer shining, but is now shrouded with those yucky grey clouds, the temperatures are still reaching toward 40 (!) and it has been happily sprinkling all morning. Not snowing! Oh happy day!

Spring is still probably more than a month away for us here in Eastern Idaho, but the end is in sight and it will come before we know it. I think I could learn a few things from my daffodils this morning.


I AM GRATEFUL

1. Family. I have the best family. My sweet little children and wonderful husband. They make me smile. They are so excited for this baby to come. The "rest" of my family. My sweet siblings and parents. They all love me. - Even though I have not been maintaining "balance" very well lately.

2. Friends. So many friends have been there to show their love for me over the past week. People I have gone to visit, end up giving ME a boost. So many people have dropped off wonderful tokens of love for me and my family. I love you all. What a wonderful place I live in!

3. A healthy body. I have walked so many miles over the past week. I'm so thankful that my body is good to me. Even when it's achy and painy. :) I'm thankful to be a woman and to have the body that I do. I'm so thankful for the part that I play in bring children into this world.

4. The Defining Line Salon. :) It is amazing what a little pampering can do for a person. :) Even if their magic essential oils don't put me into the throws of labor, it sure feels nice to get a neck massage and have some really wonderful, comfortable gals to chat with. :)

5. Garbage men. Seriously glad that we don't have to haul our own garbage to the dump. :)

6. Pine-sol. That smell will forever mean clean to me. The smell that is permeating my house right now. I love the feel of a clean floor.

7. Seasons. I love when the seasons change. I love the things that are good about each one of them. For the most part, I have really enjoyed the rest that comes with Winter this year. It has been welcome and needed. Looking forward to the Life that comes with Spring.

8. Books. I love the oblivion that can come from books. :) As long as it is moderated. :)

9. Sleep. I slept last night. Thank the Lord. Seriously.

10. Work. I am so thankful for work. For parents that taught me how to work. I don't always love it, but I am thankful for it.

11. Faith. I'm so thankful for the peace that can come (even if it is only in spurts :) from the knowledge that the Lord is in control and he truly does what is best for me and my family. Sometimes (a lot) I feel angry at this reality. I like being in control -- or at least having some kind of bargaining power, you know? I feel resentful when I can't bend circumstances around my desires. (Can you believe that I even complain about my sweet Lilie's shenanigans?? I never really wonder where she gets it from.) However, regardless of the grown up "fit throwing" that I've been doing the past few days, I'm thankful for the faith that I have in my Father in Heaven's love for me. And his eternal patience. (Gives me more than a little something to think about in my own parenting techniques.)

Ode to the Pregnant Woman

Remember this? This, right here?

Yep. That was me two and a half years ago. At approximately the same point in my pregnancy that I am right now. Reading it made me laugh. Sad to say that I'm not a lot better now than I was then. -- You would think that I would have matured somewhat . . . :) Okay, I'm not QUITE as anxious as I was then and I haven't been having nearly so many contractions as I did with Elsie, but I think this is a fairly common stage for women to go through. The Crazies.

Life is much more stable. More constant and predictable. And somehow, even with one more little child added to my life, I'm not really sure it's a lot more busy than it was then. Funny. I laughed as I read about my lists I was so obsessed about. As I sit at my computer perusing one such list at this very moment. Things that when I can check off, I should be able to go into labor as soon as we get home from church tomorrow! :) LOL! I say after church, because I knew as soon as I was given the calling of Relief Society Teacher a few weeks ago, that I absolutely would not go into labor before then. Such a mean trick. :)

I'm excited for this little lady to come. Fourth children are really awesome, if you didn't know. I know personally. :) I'm excited to meet her little personality and welcome her into the dynamic of our family. I'm excited to not be pregnant anymore - as I have definitely been more uncomfortable through the past month of this pregnancy than I have been with previous ones. -- Rolling over in bed has gotten torturous and I'm fairly certain that most all the ligaments in my lower body are stretched to maximum capacity. Shoes are tight, wedding ring isn't fitting, and many a day my face doesn't look . . . quite like my face. (Please don't let one of those days be tomorrow . . . just let me look like my (pregnant) self while standing in front of all those ladies.)

This has been a good pregnancy. I've been really very comfortable and very contented with each passing week. There is still a part of me that would be okay with remaining pregnant for another two months, as I know all the "fun things" that are coming with the arrival of this new babe. I still feel apprehensive about having FOUR children.

But at this point, I am now making a conscious decision to draw upon my rights as a woman who has been carrying around this kid for more than 8 months.

My rights to turn into a Freakazoid every once in a while.

A woman preoccupied.

A woman with a goal. A goal that I have no control over when it will start.

I take full responsibility for making this decision.

I'm going to indulge myself and accept that I will probably remain in this altered state for 2 or more weeks.

___________________________


C'mon, Freakazoid. Let start crossing off some lists!

Indulgence

After Nels took a couple of pictures of me last night, I determined that pregnancy pictures were just not something that I was going to share with the world. I think I look just fine in person, but I do not like pictures of myself - most of the time. Particularly when I'm "trying" to take a good picture. However after browsing through pictures of myself over the past 7 1/2 years, I've realized that I have probably 3 pictures of my pregnant self, total. None of which are particularly flattering.

Considering that I have spent approximately 3 full years of those past 7 growing children inside my body, I decided that flattering or not, I would indulge the masses.

33 weeks - or about 7 1/2 months.

Only 7 left to go!

I was kind of irritated in this picture that Nels was still following

me around, clicking away, as I was trying to get ready to go to a meeting.

I also love the sewing mess that has become

my bedroom in the background. :)

I've been smiling over the past seven months about gals I know that are pregnant at the same time I am and have been obsessing over their coming babies. Over the course of the last several pregnancies, my brain has seemed to have developed a bit of a defense mechanism (against anxiety and impatience) to where I don't think a lot about being pregnant until the last couple of months. The fact is, I hate waiting. I hate counting days and appointments. It makes me crazy.

Last night as I was at a Relief Society Meeting, one of the women was asking about my pregnancy and what our plans are for this and that associated with bring another baby into our home. I answered what I could and then laughed off the rest with an, "I figure we've got plenty of time to figure that out . . . during the next . . . few weeks." And it hit me. Statistically speaking, this baby will probably come within the next 5 to 6 weeks. (As each of my other children have been a week to two weeks early.) I had a bit of a wake up call. I'm still not going to bust out the crib right now or start washing onesies and socks, but . . . That is not very long. And I'm starting to feel the prickles of excitement and anxiety at the coming month or so.

I had a dream last night about a beautiful little dark-haired baby with hair so long it was halfway down her little back! :) LOL! I thought it was funny that I would be able to put a ponytail in my newborn's hair. :) It was happy and silly -- a nice change from the only other pregnancy related dream that I have had, which was flashbacks from previous deliveries and not being able to follow through with my plans at going "natural" this time. That one wasn't happy OR silly.

Wednesday Writing Fix

Darn. I was going to post a Fabulous Friday post, then realized that it's not even Thursday night. It's Wednesday! :) Well. Today is a Fabulous Wednesday. :)

1. Seven weeks left. That's fabulous. I haven't been counting the days or anything, I'm just fine with seven more weeks, but I'm excited that it's only seven. Maybe I haven't been as active this pregnancy, chasing three children around . . . (uh, maybe not) or whatever, maybe I'm just getting old :), but the last few weeks my hips and legs have been giving me grief. My nerves are pinched and standing or sitting, I still seem uncomfortable if I do anything too long. I've also developed a definite waddle - or so I feel. :) Good thing I bought those cute new pants, or I really might not like being pregnant right now! :)

2. We've pretty much settled on a name. Exciting, huh? The girls refer to her by it all the time. I love it. -- But I'm not going to share. Mean, aren't I? I'm not one who worries about someone "stealing" my name or anything and I'm pretty secure with my choices, however, sometimes I just don't want comments. You never know when some pregnant crazy woman might pop up in my place and I don't need a bunch of feedback on name choices. I just want to like it because I like it.

3. My girls have been in bed for the past half hour and Nels is gone for the evening. The house is quiet, the kitchen is clean, the refrigerator is stocked, my basement is vacuumed, and I'm at a happy place with my laundry. --------- Scratch that. I hear Elsie laughing upstairs. :) I guess falling asleep in the car at five o'clock with no dinner wasn't a good bedtime for her! :) Oh well. With or without her, I'm going to watch Netflix movies and sew tonight. :)

4. Elsie is doing very well at potty training! Oh happy day! She has the inevitable accidents, but not a lot and I think that she's going to have it down really soon. At least that's what I'm praying for! :) (I hate potty training. In my opinion, it is the worst part of parenting thus far. I would go through labor all over again to avoid potty training. I hate it. Please, please, please let Elsie be one of those "easy children"!!!)

5. I have wonderful children with fabulous personalities! They are each so unique. I love them so much! Elsie has recently developed a fun speech pattern where she ends sentences with right and huh. "Where's my daddy, huh?" "Where's my sister, huh?" "Where's it, huh?" "You get me breakfast, right? Right, Mom? Right?" I love it. When Lilie is trying to finagle a situation, she begins all her sentences with "Well . . . " (Something that I realized today she picked up from her mother.) "Lilie, what is this doing in your room??" "Well . . . " :) Today at the Melaleuca store, she really wanted me to put some of the sample makeup on her (blue eyeshadow, in particular) and for once, I obliged. She was so happy with her blush, Caribbean eyes, and red lips. I smiled every time I looked at her. :) Hazel has recently wanted (needed) to help with everything. Granted, she has always been this way to some extent, but lately, she just can't get enough of it. Every time I start to cook, she wants to know if she can do it. She's also very into being able to do things by herself. Today she carried on a fifteen minute conversation with me in the car about all the things that she'll be able to do when she's big enough to drive a car. Her favorite idea is that she could go - all by herself - to get dinner for everyone. -- And maybe she could bring Elsie with her when she goes. :) Obviously going through a new stage of independence. :) She also was wondering if big people every live across the street from their moms. She'd like to live across the street from her mom when she's big and a mom. :)

It-Snow-Fun! :)

For a few days last week, we accumulated a decent amount of snow - and it was actually warm enough for it to stick together in perfect snowman-making fashion. Hazel was able to talk her daddy into helping her out.

He's a pretty funny looking little fella, but those are my favorite kind! :)

................................................................................................

As opposed to last week's warm-up, this week has been frigid. The past two mornings have been -12 or so and have barely gotten over 10 degrees, if that. In true fashionista form, Elsie has developed her own winter style. Panties are apparently all the rage. Not necessarily using the toilet, but she loves her panties that Santa brought for her.

My plan was to just strip her down and have her run around in them for a few days until she gets it down. Alas, my plan has been foiled - as after getting over the pukes, her little system decided to go into overdrive and add a lot of poop to the fun. Always a sucker for punishment, I still drew the line at this and decided to just bide our time for a week or so before getting into potty training full-time. Nonetheless, Elsie still LOVES her panties and this is a pretty typical outfit for her the past several days.

A backpack - for going to stooloo (school) - a diaper covered by beautiful undies and her awesome sparkly red shoes! :) She's stylin'! When I asked her if she wouldn't like to at least wear a shirt, she said, "No. I'm hot." You got it, babe. You look pretty hot! :)

She has also taken on a funny game over the past month or so. I've had my fair share of kids pretending to be different things for extended periods of time. Lilie has insisted on being just about everything from bats to dinosaurs and went through a spell for about 2 months straight where I rarely got her to break out from being a kitty 24-7. However, with all the different creatures we've housed, I've never yet met a child who, more than anything else, insisted on being . . . GRANDMA. LOL!

Elsie talks constantly about how she is Grandma. Crazy, silly, pretty Grandma. But all Grandmas must have a Grandpa and who better for this role than Yours Truly? That's right, folks. She is Grandma. I am Grandpa. You would think that she would assign this role to Nels, however Nels has the very busy role of being Uncle Jake. Or Upin Jate, as she calls him. (Jake is my little 25-year-old brother.) She slaves away all day cooking up a storm for Grandpa, constantly asking where her Upin Jate is. When I repeat for the fifteenth time that Uncle Jake is at work, she again insists that he needs to come home to Grandma. She keeps me laughing all day -- but nothing is better than when she insists that it is time for Grandpa or - even better - Uncle Jake to change Grandma's diaper. "Dwamma poopy? Dwampa change Dwamma's biaper?" I bust a gut every time Grandpa changes Grandma's diaper. LOL!

................................................................................................

As mentioned previously, I'm finally getting over the nasty bug that I've had for weeks and weeks -- and am now starting to realize that I probably have less than two months left of this pregnancy. Realizing that next week I'll be moving up to appointments every two weeks for a month --- and then every week after that. I'm starting to feel a bit of anxiety that the end is coming so close. I'm so very excited to meet this new little babe, but I think I actually get MORE nervous with each child. Nervous for different reasons. At this point, as an "experienced mother" ;), I know better what to expect and start to feel a little apprehensive at being able to handle it all.

This is the first year in quite some time that I think I'm actually looking forward to the expected "slowness" of January and February. No yard work to do, no big holidays (other than birthdays) coming up, and a seemingly endless list of things that have been waiting years to be completed! :) I'm excited to share with you some of my hopefully completed projects in the coming weeks! Show you all the hard work that I've put into my bedding and desk. Complete the covers for the rocking chair that I've been using without a back cushion for more than a year. Recover a chair or two. Finish painting the girls' bedroom and maybe even start on the family room (if I can get a husband to comply)! :)

Also, sorry to those who have requested pregnancy pictures to no avail. I can't say that I feel particularly primed to take pictures of my ever-expanding self. There have also been a few other set backs. Firstly, a great many a day passes without me changing out of anything but sweats or yoga pants. Sorry if that kind of makes me seem pathetic (I know you all view me as the epitome of motherly perfection! :), but in my book, as long as I'm staying at home cleaning and cooking, yoga pants and a sweatshirt are perfectly appropriate. Secondly, even though I recently bought a new pair of maternity pants (which I love and look incredibly hot) AND finally purchased a new hairdryer after doing without for more than a month(!), it's pretty difficult to take a full-body picture of oneself alone. So you add the two together --- rarely looking spectacular, plus Nels not being home during the day --- and it just hasn't happened. (And YES, I do consider "looking spectacular" a prerequisite to taking pictures of my pregnant self for all to analyze. Sorry, I'm really shallow like that.) Perhaps the two will meet sometime in the coming weeks, but I'm not making any promises.

Over and out!

Negatory

Can you imagine being told that you have gestational diabetes one week before Christmas? I think I'd probably resign myself to dying and just pig out. :) Fat and happy.

Thankfully, that was not the case (the diabetes part, not the fat and happy part). If you have had to do this test before, I feel for you and I'm sure that you feel for me. :) Telling a woman 6 1/2 months pregnant to fast (boo) and then the only thing that you give her is a NASTY sugary drink for the next 3 hours! Are you kidding? The nurse kept asking me how I was feeling. How do you think I'm feeling??? I feel like I'm going to puke this disgustingness all over you and I haven't eaten in 12 hours.

So hooray for me. I am not gestationally diabetic. :) I can now go back to eating "whatever I want." Happy day.

Also, why is it that I only seem to get sick when Nels is very busy? This is a mean trick, Body, you hear me?

Today I am thankful for cheese covered bagels and oranges, a warm home and comfy bed, computer games, and a husband who is (going to be) willing to come home and save the day (if only he can make it before I feel compelled to just get up and save myself). ----- Also thankful for the two arms and two legs that will enable me to go make order out of the basement I have not entered all day, but which my children have been enjoying as I've slept for 4 1/2 hours.

Fabulous Thursday Night

I'm not quite sure if I'll get around to doing my Fabulous Friday tomorrow, so I think that I'll just post tonight.

1. As of today, I am officially in my third trimester!
          That is just so weird to me. I can't believe how quickly time goes at times. Maybe that's part of the reason that March is such a perfect time to have a baby. -- You are so busy all through your second trimester with the Holidays, that by the time they're over you're practically there. We're really looking forward to meeting this new little addition to our family.

2. I'm pretty much done Christmas shopping.
          How great is that?! Other than some random things for stockings and whatever Nels finally concludes he would like, I'm D-O-N-E, done. Even better, almost all of my shopping was done from the comfort of my own bedroom, in my pajamas, while my kiddos played happily together. I love online shopping. I can usually find as good, if not significantly better, prices online - AND - every time a package comes in the mail, it's like early Christmas for me! I love it. -- The joys of planning ahead!

3. My tree is not dead.
         Even after a week and a half, my cute little tree is still sucking up water! Hooray! This hasn't happened in years!

4. It's supposed to get warmer this weekend! - And snow!
          If you've ever lived in Eastern Idaho, you will appreciate that it might actually make it above THIRTY degrees this weekend!! The past WEEK has been frigid. Negative numbers nearly every night -- and into the daytime. It was -12 as I drove Hazel to school this morning and is, even now, back down to -4. We've barely gotten into double digits during the day. Not even warm enough to make a snowman.

5. This day is finally over and this week is drawing toward it's end.
          It hasn't been a horrible day. It hasn't been a horrible week. But every single day this week has felt like it should be AT LEAST Thursday to me. It has felt so long. I don't know why. Nels has been sick the past two days. He's had fevers of 103 - 104 ---- and has been all but useless. :) Just kidding. I feel so bad for him. He's got so much to get done, that is getting pushed back as he lies in bed moaning and groaning. Poor man. This evening Lilie was complaining of feeling sick and I'm not positive that Elsie isn't coming down with it as well.
          On top of my little sickies, I ruined a project that I've really been looking forward to completing. I've planned on making a calendar / bulletin board for my bedroom out of an old - and big - frame that I picked up this summer. As I was finishing it up - with several irritating, but fixable mistakes along the way - I pushed the glass to center it better and cracked it. Right through the center. ---- As it is, I'm not going to stress about it at the moment and it will remain with its huge crack until some distant date. But still incredibly . . . frustrating.
          So yeah. It's been a decent week, but I'm ready for it to be over. I'm ready for Christmas break. I'm glad it's getting closer.

6. We have a name for our new baby!
          The girls (Hazel and Lilie) ask Elsie all the time things about having a new baby. Things like, "Are you excited, Elsie?" To which Elsie gives them unrelated answers, because she doesn't really understand what they're talking about. :) She's an incredibly talkative little lady and has recently started making up her own words to things -- or at least her own meanings to words. Words such as "laslards". I have absolutely no idea what this word means to her or what word she is perhaps trying to say, but I laugh every time she says it. She has also been playing a lot with a shapes puzzle we have. I'll tell her the name of the shapes as she puts them in their correct place.
          So as my big girls were asking Elsie all sorts of random questions the other day, they asked, "Elsie! What should we name our new baby?!" To which she promptly replied, "Baby Otadon." So their you have it folks. Our next baby, by sisterly decree, will be named Baby Octagon. One of my all time favorites. So named by her sister, Fish.

(When I was pregnant with Elsie, Hazel insisted that Fish was a very nice name for our new baby.)

7. I have fingernails.
         That's worth posting about, isn't it? Of course it is. I've always been a compulsive nail biter. - Not something I'm proud of, but a habit that has been with me as long as I can remember. I've gone through brief spurts of reform in the past few years, but in the end, I always seem to regress. I've learned, however, through these sporadic periods of self control, that I have kind of thin nails that are prone to chip and break easily. Well, with the help of some serious introspection and the joys of pregnancy hormones, I've been able to achieve something that I have coveted of others (especially my SIL, Melyni) for most of my life. Healthy, long nails. {{{satisfied sigh}}} I don't know if it will last, but I'm relishing it for now.  ((Melyni, I honestly think that you have some of the prettiest nails I've ever seen. I'm not, by nature, a jealous person, but I wish I had nails like yours. Heck, I'd even settle for nails like Nels's. Such perfect nails should never be wasted on a man! :)

8. I have creative children.
          I was just thinking that I couldn't think of anything else for now. That my brain had come up with all the fabulous things it could think of in its sleep deprived stupor. Then, I looked down at the desktop next to my hand and saw the word "MOM" etched there in my sweet Lilie's adorable handwriting. It is also scrawled in the file cabinet drawer to the right of me. I thought of how I could rant about how irritating it is to me that my child feels the need to "leave her mark" wherever she sits. That she has defaced several pieces of furniture here in the basement. But you know, as I looked at it, it brought a smile to my face. Of all the things she chose to write. MOM.

I love my girl.