Unpacking . . .

It'll kind of be like unpacking your house after someone else packed it up. You're never sure what's in the box and all too often you've got a bunch of random things in there that don't belong with the rest and you don't really know what to do with them. Yep. That's what this post is going to be like.

Speaking of unpacking, I've still got about 25 boxes to unpack. I'm not thrilled. I'm tired of unpacking. I feel like I've been unpacking for 2.5 years.

It's been foggy for the past three days. Everything is covered in hoarfrost. The weeping birch trees look like frozen fountains. It's kinda magical.

Hazel, Elsie, and Lilie can think of nothing but going to see their cousin, Winston, who is now a mere 30 minutes away. I don't blame them, those Moores are pretty great.

All three of them are also adjusting to school really, really well. I know I mentioned this in the last post, but seriously, I can't even express what a relief this is for me. I worry so much that we're damaging them by not allowing them to put down roots anywhere, but they are a testament to me that we have all the stability that they need right here within our family. They teach me.

Violet and Clara have watched too much TV the past two months.

Violet and Clara are learning to play really, really well together. It makes my heart happy. Today they are dressed up as a princess and a jack-o-lantern.

Orange is Violet's FAVORITE color. That makes me happy.

Clara doesn't really love clothes. Unless I put her footie pj's on backward (we had to cut all the "footies" off months ago), she wakes up naked, freezing, and in a soggy bed (because she also takes off her diaper) at about 2:30 every morning. Since implementing the "straight-jacket" sleeping method, we've all been much happier.

Violet is getting new glasses sometime this week. I am really hoping that it (again) helps mellow out the melt-downs that are so uncharacteristic of her pleasant, easy-going personality. Winter comes along and she spends lots of time drawing and her eyes get so tired. Her old glasses are too small and hurt her ears, so she doesn't keep them on.

Amid the thousands of wonderful things that I've not recorded in the past year, Violet got her hair cut by her Aunt Genny this last Thanksgiving while we were in Utah. It's adorable and she loves it.

Clara loves to dance. Any music results in a spontaneous dance-party.

Clara is SO SASSY! Many, many unexpected things in her life are met with, "Why you do dat???" One of our last nights in Sandpoint, she was playing chase with Daddy and I scared her as she came flying around a corner. She jumped, squealed, and then immediately said, "Why you scare me, Mom?!!!" We took the girls to see "Frozen" a couple weeks ago and right at the most intense part of the movie, it's silent, and the princess has just turned to ice. Everyone is very sad, of course. Clara yells, "WHY YOU DO DAT, DAD???!!!" It "broke the ice" (haha) and everyone in the theater laughed.

My girls are growing up so much. While I was at our new place with the movers to unpack the truck, Hazel stayed home from school and babysat her three younger sisters for NINE HOURS - and was still smiling when I relieved her at 5:00. I was only a 1/4 mile away and checked on her frequently throughout the day, but she did awesome. I really count on my Hazel. She loves to read, loves to talk, loves to be with other people, and loves learning. She has one of the most pure hearts I've ever known.

Lilie reminds me of myself daily. She loves creating and colors. We had a tour of their new school the Friday before everyone came back from Christmas break and she asked repeatedly about the art class. :) She is an incredible artist. A true introvert, it is so hard to pull information from her about her day and what's on her mind anytime but in the quietest one-on-one moments. She talks plenty and LOUDLY, :) but it's hard to hear what's in her heart without listening. I'm trying to learn how to listen better.

Elsie is such a little people-person. She is loving her new school and LOVES being the "new girl". Her teacher adores her and commented on how wonderfully she's transitioning - as if she's always been part of their class. At her first parent-teacher conference in Sandpoint, her teacher had talked about the possibility of moving her up a grade. She's ready, both intellectually and socially and only misses the cutoff by a month. Nels and I spent a day or two thinking about it and in the end decided that she's right where she needs to be. She is really starting to develop helping others and reaching out to those who may be struggling as a big part of her personal identity. We feel that it's a benefit for her to be older in her class. It thrills my heart to see her take others under her wing so much. She is such a warm person.

This is Elsie with her friend Henry before we left Sandpoint. He was in both her Pre-K class last year and her Kindergarten class this year. To say that he LOVES Elsie would be an understatement.

Nels? He's doing good. He likes his new job and he even gets to come home for lunch on a regular basis. He told me last week that because of security measures, working real late at this job isn't even an option!! Can you believe it?! :) Really, they seem like a great company. And starting today Nels and I are doing another 30 day sugar fast - like we did last January. Gotta get ready for Costa Rica this summer! :)

As for me, I'm really looking forward to the day when I break down the last box. In the meantime, I scheme all day about what I want to do that evening when the kids finally go to bed and I "clock out" for the day . . . so far I haven't been able to actually DO that since we moved in, but I keep hoping.

(my first knitting project - in our temporary apartment - before the boxes and boxes and boxes came)

And most days, since I don't leave the house (and sometimes when I do), I wear something colorfully crazy --- because it makes me happy (and sometimes hides my hair that I haven't washed in three days).

I'll have to remember to pair up that hat with the orange tights, multicolored skirt, and blue slippers I'm wearing today. :)

Time to Move On

Well, hello there.

 . . . . 

So . . . we've had some changes in our lives. 

What's new, right? 

In November of last year, Nels got laid off from Coldwater Creek.     

It was scary. It was hard. It was good.

Nels immediately got to work with emails and phone calls to put the word out there that he was looking for a new job.

Right away side jobs and inquiries started rolling in. Within a month he had several paying projects in the works and two job offers -- one in Pullman, WA and one in Seattle. We decided to sleep and pray on it.

The next morning, I awoke to Nels's telling me that he knew where we needed to be.

So here we are - in Pullman, Washington - set right in the middle of an ocean of rolling wheat fields called the Palouse, seven miles from the Idaho border.

We are settling into a mild, snowless January (what is this place?!). Nels is feeling good about his new job and the team he works with (that's a great thing). The girls are loving their new school (I should have known they would do awesome) and after living like nomads for two weeks, I am slowly getting us unpacked into our new home (a 1400 sqft daylight-basement duplex). We all are finally sleeping in our own beds (WITH SHEETS!) and while we lived in temporary housing, I picked up knitting as a new hobby (always good to have something to spend more money on). 

We are really hoping to love our new home, but one thing I've learned about over the past few years is that I'm a slow transition-er. I feel a little like I'm hibernating as we get used to our new surroundings, 

but I'm praying for a glorious Spring.

Release

There was once a time when sitting at this screen felt like second nature to me. As I'd trot through my day, I'd think in Blog. My mind felt alive with thoughts that I couldn't wait to release. I look back at those days and much of what I shared was trivial, mostly sweet joys of the day, but I also felt the thrill of giving life to something that was once just inside.

As I sat down just now, the Post Screen felt foreign to me --- wondering what it is that is inside. What is it I want to share? I've exhausted my avenues of time wasting today and I've either got to get it out so that I can stop non-feeling it or get busy so that I can tuck it away in my Later drawer.



This last month . . .

About a month ago, Nels came home and told me that Coldwater announced that they are "looking into alternatives" to stem the financial difficulties that they've been dealing with the last few years.

After the initial yikes! the peace came. Whatever happens will happen and we will be fine. The past two years have taught me nothing if not how to roll - and how to have faith that we'll keep on rolling to a better place - both outside and inside.

Last Wednesday, I called Nels while out shopping for Halloween costumes at Goodwill:

"What do you think of robbers?"

Nels: "Sure. Sounds good."

"Great! I've found perfection. What are you doing for lunch? Maybe we'll stop by."

N: "Um. I'm at home."

"Oh, you should have called me so that I would be home."

N: " . . . I'm taking the rest of the day off."

" . . . . . . Why? Is everything okay?"

N: " . . . I'll talk to you about it when you get home."


Coldwater Creek laid-off about 20% of their employees last week. Today is Nels's last day.

We have both felt the sweet peace that comes from the Spirit - that all will be well. Nels has felt very firmly that this whole process will lead to better things.

Bless him.

These last couple of months have been challenging. As we moved, Nels has been my rock. Constantly encouraging me and building me up. When I've felt like I'm running on fumes, he's been ready to take the next step and let me know it's not too hard. It's gonna be easy! :)

I love him.

With this new hurdle, I've also felt good. I feel confident. But at the same time, today I'm tired.

I so love stability and as I look forward, it just looks like uncertainty and change and it feels weighty. I know there are rays of goodness and light creeping around the edges of this blah. I know that once I get the toys cleaned and my bed made and my body washed, I'm going to feel better

- but it'd be a lie to not acknowledge that right now I just kinda feel like curling up and crying.

Time to Face the Music

It's that time of year again!!!

What time? you're asking.

Moving time, of course! It's September! that means we get to move again . . .

{sigh}

The house that we've been living in for the past year has been on the market all summer. It's been so fun, but it's coming to an end as we got word on Monday that the house has sold and we have until the 25th to be out.

That's two weeks from today.

I feel a little sick, a lot resigned, a bit frustrated, and really tired. Every once in a while, a little glimmer of "it's going to be great" comes creeping in at the seams and gives me some hope. Thank the Lord for hope. Because I really do have faith that all will be well, but reality is still challenging.

We shall see where we land, but most likely it will mean changing wards and schools again.

{double sigh}

My Hazel has already spent some major tears on that prospect and I don't blame her a bit. In her four complete years of school, she has attended three different elementaries. We've moved so many times, leaving behind valued relationships with each of them. It takes a toll.

But we are trying to focus not on what we've left behind, but what we gain each time as well. And I do know we have gained a great deal each time - and the friendships from the past, the real ones, remain.

So here's to learning to bend . . . or maybe it's just a lesson in learning how to kneel.

A Short List

I'm ALIVE!!!!!

and actually thriving --- even if my blog isn't. :)

A few things in list form:

• We spent the entire month of June driving 3000+ miles all over Idaho and Utah. It was a wonderful time. I will post some pics . . . next week.
• Summer is here in Sandpoint and we are loving the beach. Glorious summers in Sandpoint!
• We may be moving (in town) again. The owner of our home *may* be in the process of selling. That thought makes me kinda want to cry . . . but I'm not going to. I will be excited for whatever comes our way.
• While in Utah, I was able to attend the temple. First time I've attended without some kind of serious time constraints in a LONG LONG time. It was marvelous and I can say without hesitation that the Lord hears and answers our prayers. I feel better than I have in quite some time.
• Took the girls to their first ever play last weekend, "The Wizard of Oz". They thought is was magical and it made my heart explode to see them so happy. 
• I'm going to sell my fish. Having too much of a good time keeping everyone else alive . . . something's gotta give.
• Instead I've developed a new-found love of non-fiction . . . Who knew?! Non fiction can be both thought provoking AND hilarious! I'm growing up!
• Two reasons why I love my husband: A) he talks in his sleep and B) he has the most perfect back-scratching-fingernails in the whole world.

That is all.

The Long-Awaited Slow Down

I'd like to begin this post with a huge thank you to all of you who have put up with the massive ups and downs that I've had this past year - and still love me anyway. :) These kind of cuckoo swings are unusual for me. Thanks for being supportive. I promise to stop being such a baby, put on my big-girl panties, and get on with life. :) Our lives are so very happy and full and I am incredibly happy here in Sandpoint. Sometimes I just get overwhelmed how unsettled our lives have been. So thanks.

Anyway. Enough of that.

I've realized that it's been quite a while since we just did a good-ol'-fashion update, so here we go.

First off - I really like our new house. It's got lots of room inside and out and we've been LOVING IT. Seriously, I don't even know what to do with all the storage in this house. It's awesome. There is a huge family room upstairs that I'm still trying to figure out how to use and a big living room on the main level that feels just like home.

Unpacking has been an excruciatingly slow process. I think I'm just a little burned out of doing it, but every time I make some progress, it feels like the windows of heaven are shining down on me and I skip all around. :) It's seriously ridiculous how happy it makes me.

The yard is amazing and I'm really looking forward to all the fun I'll have in it when there isn't so much to do inside. There are acres of fun little areas to play in and the most perfect white raspberry patch that needs cleaned up. There are horses in the property behind us and a rooster that crows constantly next door. Last week we roasted hot dogs and marshmallows in the fire pit for dinner and then had a great time playing with the marshmallow guns I made for the girls - something like 3 years ago at a Super Saturday. :)

Since moving in, we've seen lots of deer and a bluejay (have you ever seen a REAL bluejay??? they're gorgeous!). The other night there was something or several big things in the trees to the side of our house, but it was too dark to know what it was. Makes me want to get a dog - but instead I think we're just going to get a new kitten. (hope it doesn't get eaten!) With the house, we've adopted the big, black cat that lives here, but I think today we might go find a new replacement for Gertie (who found a new home at my parents' house when we moved to Sandpoint).

We are all adjusting well to the new school year. Hazel and Lilie love their classes and Elsie is in preschool 2 days a week. She counts down every day until she can go again. It's so cute. I definitely don't feel that preschool is a necessary step for kids before they go to kindergarten, but the social time for Elsie has been really, really great. She just loves people SO much!

When we were at my parents house last month, one night my mom and dad had the young single adults in the ward they serve in come over to the house for a backyard pizza party. My parents have built a new outdoor pizza oven.) We made our pizzas and ate before "the singles" came over and then went inside as they started showing up. Elsie kept trying to sneak back outside. - I thought she just wanted to go back out to get another snow cone from Grandpa. - After I stopped her for about the 5th time, she scowled at me, stomped her feet, and just started crying because she "really needed to go out and meet the people!" She was so upset - not because of the treats - but because I wouldn't let her go out and meet all the new people who had shown up! :) She is such a funny little social butterfly. No matter where we go, she is constantly finding someone new to introduce herself to. Even at the pool, she will inevitably end up over by that couple that is sitting down from you on the steps making out (you know the ones - they're at every pool!). I'll take my eyes off her for 30 seconds and the next thing I know, she's down there telling them her life story and asking them their names. :)

So yeah. Hazel and Lilie are doing well. :) Lilie plays every day with lots of different kids, but - true to form - can only tell me about 3 names of the kids in her class. :) She just doesn't care that much about those kind of silly details, which I think is hilarious. Hazel knows everyone's name and can talk endlessly about who is nice and who follows the rules and who doesn't raise their hand. :) The differences between those two constantly amuses me.

Hazel's 9th birthday is this coming Sunday and for the first time in probably 5 years, we are going to have a birthday party with friends. (I don't like arranging parties.) She is super excited and we're keeping it VERY low key.

Violet is now 2 1/2 and we decided to finally potty train her last week. It lasted one day. I hate potty training. She is a joy to have around. A loud, silly, weird joy. :) She loves to be the family clown, is almost always happy, and is very concerned with whether the people around her are happy with her. She is still my most bashful child around strangers, but loves nursery.

Clara turned ONE last month - and I'm going to write up a post just for her. She is walking and jabbers a lot. She finally has TWO teeth and a couple days before her birthday, I set up her crib for the first time. :) I'd had her just sleeping in the port-a-crib in our walk-in closet in the other house. She has always been incredibly easy-going, but in the past month or so, she's decided to develop an opinion about things. She also will regularly tell-off anyone who gets in her way. She only says about four or five understandable words, but her tone makes the meaning of her jabbery rebuke clear as day. :)

Last week, Nels did something that I don't think he's been able to do more than once in the past 5 years. He took a whole week off of work. And not because he was sick, but because he had PTO to use up and he was able to actually do it. It was a miracle.

Violet and I had strep throat the week before and I was so worried that Nels was going to get it too and then be sick all week. Lucky for us, he avoided our germs. Unlucky for him, Sunday as he was helping the girls find their church shoes, somehow he hurt his back again and spent the next 4 days mostly lying on the floor on his back. {{{sigh}}} I say "mostly" because Monday he was feeling well enough to still make it to the Anthrax concert in Spokane with a friend. :) Ironically, the friend he went to the concert with is a chiropractor here in town. :) It was REALLY nice to have him around and Thursday he helped me make some serious headway in cleaning up the garage. He also took really good care of the girls while I was able to so a lot of cleaning and unpacking. I sure do love that guy!

Saturday Tracy, Tom, and Winston came to visit. It was REALLY great to see them. I think we'll be able to tempt them back more often. :) We took them down to the lake and the kids had a great time swimming --- even though we didn't have swimsuits with us. :) Who needs them anyway? My girls have no complaints about swimming in long sleeves and denim ruffle skirts. :)

As for me, things are going good. Other than the occasional mental breakdown, I'm actually really happy. Fall has rolled in full-force, complete with warm afternoons, cool nights, golden leaves, and the natural slowing down that always comes this time of year. The days are getting shorter and I find myself in a mad rush each evening to get everything done before the sun sets. Before I know it, the sun will be setting right after the kids get home from school. :) But until then, we are enjoying another beautiful season in Sandpoint. Last week we passed our One Year mark. It seems so strange how time marches on. In some ways it feels like just yesterday, but in other ways it feels like a lifetime ago. -- But I guess there are a lot of things in life that feel that way.

I'm finally starting to feel like we're getting into the rhythm of life again - with menus and baths and bedtimes. I'm baking bread again - if only I can figure out this new oven so I stop burning it. And I'm realizing (once again) that the more time I spend outside the better I cope with life. :)

Pics of our backyard.

.

Landing. Again.

August was a doozie. I'm not really sure what I'm supposed to be learning during this incredibly crazy chapter of our lives, but it sure is a wild ride.

The whole summer, really, just flew by so quickly --- in the wonderful way that it does when you spend warm afternoons at the lake or with visitors.

August came along and I escaped to Utah for a week and a half, came home and packed up our whole house - for the third time in a year, celebrated our tenth anniversary, moved across town, unpacked the kitchen, packed our bags again, drove to Utah a second time, took family pictures, had a reunion, saw some dinosaur bones, drove 14 hours back home, and started school the next day.

Last week I kept thinking, "why am I so tired???"

I felt like I was never going to feel rested again.

But I'm finally starting to feel human again and it's really nice. All our beds are finally made and hopefully by the end of today, our clothes will be unpacked. There are mountains of laundry to be done --- which I'm actually feeling excited to do in our NEW washer and dryer --- and for the first time in . . . months, I've made a menu. Happy day! :)

Over the course of this move from "town" to the "sticks", I've not had internet access from anything except my phone. It's been weird and frustrating. - It is always annoying to recognize how dependent I am on the world wide web for my connections to the outside world - from cooking and socializing to information and shopping. :) However, when I live hours and hours and hours and hours from my family and most of my lifelong friends and I have five little children and a lot of work to get done each day, I guess it's a blessing that it's available at all.

I'm excited to be connected again. I'm excited to be able to listen to Dr. Laura and Rush Limbaugh again.  I'm excited to read blogs again. And hopefully I'll be excited to share some little updates of what has happened over the last month.

I Think Weird is a Weird Word

So I've been hiding out in Bountiful for the past week+.

It's been nice. SO nice to spend the time with my family. We've done some shopping for our upcoming family pictures and back-to-school, lots of hanging out and eating (always), not much sleeping, lots of feeding and holding LITTLE, bitty babies, and . . . well, my brain is tired.

We've done stuff and it's been fun.

I miss Nels - but better to miss him while I'm here than to miss him while I'm still at home - right? :) I'm really excited to see him tomorrow night.

.
.
.

So, I've got this weird feeling somewhere between my heart and my stomach. I'm thinking maybe my liver? or pancreas?

I've been practicing my relaxation techniques and sometimes it helps --- as long as no one asks me any direct questions about my immediate future.

All I know is in exactly one week, all our stuff needs to be out of it's current location.

On the Move

We're going to be moving at the end of this month.

Fun, huh?

We'll have been in this house for a full six months by then, so we figured, What the Heck! It's about time. 

Beyond a year and a half that we lived in a trailer in Rexburg while finishing up Nels's last bit of school and then our home in Idaho Falls where we lived for 4 1/2 years, I don't think we've lived anywhere much longer than 6 months.

All told, in the ten years Nels and I have been married, I think this will be the . . . 13th move for us.

Yep. We have a problem.

To top it off, of those 13 moves we've made, several have been within the weeks surrounding our anniversary. It's been either moving or I've been pregnant. Or both. For funsies, let's see . . . 

• got married and moved into our first apartment together. (2002)
• 1st Anniversary - pregnant with Hazel and moved back from a summer in Mnt. Home (2003)
• 2nd - pregnant with Lilie and moved back from a summer in Bountiful (2004)
• 3rd - Neither! It's a miracle!
• 4th - Neither
• 5th - pregnant with Elsie and had moved 1 1/2 months before. (2007)
• 6th - Neither
• 7th - pregnant with Violet (2009)
• 8th - Neither
• 9th - pregnant with Clara and getting ready to move (2011)
• 10th - MOVING

Hahahaha! That's hilarious. We chose the worst time of the year to get married. Ever. :)

So get this.

It's the best part.

We don't know where we're moving to yet!!! 

I repeat. --- Fun, huh?

We do, however, have a new family lined up to be moving into this house on September 1st. So we'd better figure it out by then. :)

We have a couple of options, but we don't know which one of those options we're going to choose. One of the places we're looking at is just across town - 500 more sqft, 2 1/2 acres of land, and lower rent and utilities. Our other option . . . well, you'll just have to wait and see with us. :)  And we don't have enough information to make a final decision. And I don't have any real control over WHEN we will.

{{sigh}}

THIS I do know. Wherever we land at the end of this month, is going to be really good. And I'm excited.

Right now, we are planning a trip to Utah this weekend. Which will be fun. We are going to the wedding of one of Nels's good friends from Ireland. She is getting married in the Twin Falls Temple on Saturday and I am so excited to meet her. And then we'll go to Utah for a couple of days before I ship Nels back home to work while I stay with my family for a few more days.

Our two week plan seems simple enough, but I have a feeling that it's just going to be the calm before the storm. :)

I'm going to take a quote from last summer . . .

"I have a feeling that August is going to feel like a tornado. Bring it on!"

February: all in one post

Tick, tock, tick, tock . . .

It's May.

Oh well, I'm going to give you a quick (not) little (not) overview of what February was for us . . . crazy.

As part of his job, four times a year, Nels will be traveling for about a week. Shooting video at the seasonal photo shoots that Coldwater has in various different locations. I'm not gonna lie, when Nels told me that he was heading to Miami, while I stayed in Idaho . . . in February . . . I was a teensy bit jealous. :) Especially when he'd send me pictures like the one above. {{sigh}} :)

Someday, Rachel. Someday.

Because Sandpoint is an hour and a half from the airport and because he had an early flight, Coldwater Creek put Nels up in a hotel in Spokane the night before he left for Florida. The kids LOVE staying in hotels and so we decided that we'd drive Daddy down and then stay the night with him.

I had grand plans for our day. Nels only worked half a day, so we were going to get the girls early from school and then go to the children's museum and explore downtown Spokane a little bit before we headed over to the hotel to swim for hours and hours before bedtime. I was at least as excited as the kids and couldn't wait to get out of our tiny apartment for two days.

Then right before Nels got home I decided to take ten minutes to myself getting ready in the bathroom with the door closed and Violet found the laundry detergent that I'd left within her reach and decided to pump Melaleuca's fabulously concentrated liquid laundry detergent into about thirty different spots up and down the hallway and all over her bedroom. {{sigh}}

So instead of having fun, we spent about four hours that afternoon cleaning carpet.

I was . . . um . . . mad.

Poor Nels. I bet his arms were extra, extra sore for the next few days afterward. But at least during, he kept a smile. :)

So in case you are ever in a similar predicament, with a similarly mischievous toddler, I'm going to give you a rundown on how to get laundry soap from carpet.

First, I dumped salt into all of the soapy spots, which really helped soak up some of it and keep it from spreading further before we could get to it.

After you vacuum the soapy salt up, then the real fun begins.

You pour hot-as-you-can-stand water into the soap spot, then you vacuum it up as fast as you can.

Then you pour more hot-as-you-can-stand water into the spot, then vacuum it up as fast as you can.

Then you repeat that about ten to twenty times, depending on how big or saturated the spot is.

You just keep sucking and sucking and sucking that spot until your arms fall off and no more soap comes up.

Then you cry a little bit and move on to the next, even bigger, spot.

It. Sucked. For Hours. Literally.

Anywho, we eventually did make it to the hotel that night. At around 7:45. We picked up some pizza on the way and let the kids swim until about 10. Not quite the night that we were hoping for, but we still had fun being together with Daddy before he abandoned us. :) And as angry as I was that Violet did what she did, I said several prayers of gratitude that she did it before Nels left for Miami and not after. :)

Besides, as big of a handful as she is, I think I'll at least keep her till she stops being cute. :)

We all survived the week that Nels was gone, without too many more swearing-at-the-kids moments.

A few days later, Hazel had a really fun folk-dance performance at school that Nels was able to attend with her.

She was really excited! :)

Within a couple of days of Nels getting home, I got an email from the lady processing our short sale at the mortgage company. She was letting me know that they'd come to the conclusion that our home in Idaho Falls needed to be listed as our "primary residence" in order for our short sale to move forward. Period.

I told her, "Great. As of today, it is our primary residence. My girls and I are just 'visiting' my husband here in Sandpoint."

She then got all nutsy on me about how our furniture needed to be there (DONE!) and she would need to send somebody by to inspect our house, "just to make sure" that we were really there.

I was completely annoyed, but just really, really ready to move things forward with selling our house. So I packed up the three younger girls and headed back to Idaho Falls for an indeterminate amount of time.

As much as I hate driving so far, the drive between Sandpoint and Idaho Falls . . . well maybe more like: between Sandpoint and Butte . . . is actually really lovely. Montana at dawn is stunning.

We made it to Idaho Falls, set up house and tried repeatedly to get a hold of someone to schedule a time for this unnamed "representative" to come over and "make sure" we were there. It was maddening.

In the end, after "Angi" had apparently checked the box saying that our I.F. home was our "primary residence", our file immediately got passed on to the next lady in the chain of command. I finally got in contact with this angelic woman a couple of days after driving down (again trying to get the name and number of this "mystical informer" who needed to come over to our house), as we spoke it became clear that the last lady I'd been working with knew absolutely nothing and the mysterious "person" who needed to stop by our house was actually just a third party who would probably just drive past our house (if anything) to make sure that it didn't look "abandoned". Which means that thanks to one person's incompetence, I drove all the way to Idaho Falls with three little children and stayed there for several days for no reason. Nice.

However, we made the most of the situation and were able to visit with a lot of friends and drove down to Utah to see my family - which was fabulous.

My sweet siblings all came up to my parent's house to see me and my girls on Sunday. I love my family. Love them. And miss them incredibly. We had a good time laughing at Genny's incredible dancing doggy. :)

Tuesday my mom went with me and the girls to IKEA and then to Gardener's Village in south Salt Lake, where Elsie and Violet had a grand time trying on a whole wall of scarves. It was a beautiful day and so nice to spend time with my Mommy.

One of my biggest original dilemmas about going to Idaho Falls had been that I wasn't sure I would be back to Sandpoint in time for Valentine's Day or Nels's birthday which is the following day. As it turned out, we didn't make it back for V-Day - which wasn't too big a deal - but Nels made it special for our girls at home by making them special heart pancakes and by "doing their hair really nice". :)

He's such a good dad.

We did make it home for his birthday the next day by driving from Idaho Falls to Bountiful Tuesday night and then packing up at 2:00 in the morning Wednesday and making it home to Sandpoint by about 10:00.

This is a picture of how Elsie "wasn't tired" on the trip back home. :) Violet didn't sleep at all the whole way, but Elsie and Clara slept most of the way home. They were all little troopers.

I'd had plans of making Nels a big yummy dinner and a cake that evening, but after driving all the way home the girls and I were completely pooped and not feeling real hot, so I promised Nels that we'd do it the next night - which he was completely fine with.

However, it seems that while we were in Utah, we'd contracted the plague and I spent the next several days sleeping on the couch or standing outside on our balcony with one or the other or both of our little babies while they tired to just breathe and cool off. Poor Violet and Clara both had raging fevers and congestion and hacking, hacking coughs. Elsie had pink eye and then Nels had pink eye. Then Nels and Hazel got the plague virus as well. It was horrible. In the end, right around the time that everyone else was starting to feel better (more than a week later - it was such a nasty bug!) I started to get sick. Because that's the way life goes.

We eventually DID celebrate Nels's birthday, sometime. I don't really remember when, it was all such a haze of tiredness, but I have pictures to prove that it actually happened. We're so glad he was born!

How could we not love him? He's just so awesome!

Happy Birthday!

TO

ME!!!

He's such a ham. No wonder our kids are weirdos. :) I'm so thankful for Nels. He makes me laugh daily and he's the best friend I could ever ask for.

Buried

Oh, my blog.

{{{sigh}}}

I think about you daily.

I want to post.

I want to post the things that we're doing.

I'm GOING to post.

I just don't know when.

There is so much to do
-like laundry
-like dishes
-like dinner
-like unpacking . . . still
-like food
-like keeping Violet from pushing Clara's face into the ground
-like . . . avoiding the office because it's a disaster.

Now. I LOVE what I do all day

. . . except for the days that I have a meltdown on my two oldest kids because they leave a string of messes behind them - everywhere they go - worse than a toddler.

I love my life. I love being a mom.

I do not love moving my entire house.

I still haven't quite figured out what to do with everything and I'm now to the point of avoiding it by doing idiotic and unproductive things -- but not anything that is deliberate (like blogging or sewing) and I KNOW will take an hour or so -- because there really are other things that NEED to be done first.

Instead I spend all afternoon browsing Amazon for things that I don't need right now.

I also think I might need to reevaluate some of my current blogging techniques. I don't blog because I don't want the hassle of pictures. Well, I might have to just start going without visual aids for the time being . . . at least half of the time.

I just need to knuckle down and get to work.

Because I've been in some odd state of "unpacking" and "in between" for over SEVEN months now.

But I'm going to do it. Today is a new day and I've already made tremendous progress.

Just muscle through it so that I can start making time for some fun things that I've been looking forward to doing again.

I LOVE BEING A MOM.

I DO NOT LOVE UNPACKING.

That Loving Feeling

We are no longer home owners. We signed the closing documents this morning.

My feelings are so conflicted on the subject, but overall, I'm am very relieved. Thank you to each and every one of you who have kept us in your thoughts and prayers over the past seven months. What a whirlwind it's all been. Thank you. Thank you.

Another chapter of our lives is now closed and the door swings wide open on this new one.

Eight months ago, Nels was working all night, yet again. He'd been working non-stop since the beginning of the month - getting ready for Melaleuca's Convention. He was stressed to the max. I was less than two months from having our fifth baby girl. I can remember standing in the laundry room tackling "Mt. Washmore" at half-past-way-too-late-at-night and suddenly just losing it. The years of late nights and stress caught up with me and I fell to my knees and told the Lord that I would do anything for Nels to be able to have a different job and be a part of our family again.

Three weeks later he was offered a job at Coldwater Creek.

This last weekend, we packed up our kids for a VERY quick and somewhat spontaneous trip to Idaho Falls to pack up the rest of our house and say goodbye, one last time.

Nels got off work Friday afternoon, we packed and waited for the girls to get home from school, threw everyone in the van, made it to Idaho Falls by about 2:30 in the morning. Bright and early Saturday, we hopped out of our beds on the floor and started organizing, packing, and emptying out my 55 gallon fish tank. A few friends stopped by to visit and help (Hannah Graf (+kids), Brian Carter (+new girlfriend), Ken Dudley, Mark Blethen). All too soon, the movers showed up and the real chaos began. Nels took the girls to Mark's house and I watched as our lives were slowly and efficiently packed away into box after box after box . . .

The movers left that evening with the promise of returning early the next morning to finish. As they were packing up for the night, our dear friends (the Joneses) stopped by to say hi and goodbye, before we rushed them out the door to go to dinner with some good friends from Melaleuca.

As we tucked our tired children into their floor beds for one last night in our home, I was completely overcome with emotion. Nels and I spent the next couple of hours reliving our lives in that home, laughing and crying. The children that have joined our family, happiness, injuries :), stress, loneliness, learning, jumping on the trampoline and swinging in the hammock, countless hours spent digging and planting in the yard and painting and loving every single wall. All the friendships that we've made, the people we've loved, and all the love that has been poured out upon us there. All. the. BLESSINGS.

So many blessings.

The next morning, the movers showed up at dawn, the girls and I took one last opportunity to say goodbye to some friends while Nels and Clara took one last nap in the dark basement, and then before I knew it, the huge semi was pulling away.

We quickly got dressed for church, stopped in to some neighbors' to say goodbye, and walked in (late! of course) to Sacrament Meeting one last time with those people who have been almost like family to us over the past five years. It was a sweet meeting.

I opened the hymnal to the closing hymn, took one look at the title, closed the book, and just let the tears roll. "Because I Have Been Given Much" I looked over to Nels and he, too, was teary. Because truly, we have been given so much. And even though we've not seen most of those people for half a year, they were still giving to us. We were greeted warmly and lovingly and couldn't get away without Sister Beverly Reed "gently insisting" :) upon "just running home real quick" and making us a full meal before we set out for home. :)

While Beverly was serving away in her kitchen for us, we took one last chance to say goodbye to our neighbor Bob Hart - who has been in the hospital for the last several weeks. I will never, never, never think of our lives in Idaho Falls without Bob being a large, shining part of it. Up until the last year or so when his health has given him some grief, there was hardly a single day that I was not greeted with Bob's warm smile and crazy stories. :) He and Ramona have been the best neighbors we ever could have asked for.

Beverly made an entire meal, fed us, and still made it back in time to conduct the closing song in Relief Society. :) She is both a miracle worker and an angel.

Back home we changed our clothes, packed up the van, dug up and potted a few of my friends that I just loved too much to leave behind, and called our children to pray one last time in our empty home. It was all kicks and giggles (literally) until then. (see below)

It started with Hazel, then me, then Nels (sort of {wink, wink}), and by the time the prayer was over Lilie and Elsie were just wailing too. We had a little cry fest while Violet went around hugging everyone and telling them that she was sorry :), then Nels packed his sobbing girls into the van while I said goodbye to my home.

"Smile!" Face

Real Face.

 Six months. To the day. Since we packed up and left in September.

As we pulled away, I couldn't help but think of my prayer eight months earlier. How the Lord has answered me and opened another path before us. The road behind us had been difficult in many ways, but so overwhelmingly good, too. We didn't have to move. It was the path we chose and it will be good  as well. I know it.

Saturday, I was talking to Lilie and asked her what she would miss most about living in Idaho Falls -- fully expecting an answer like, "my friends" or "my room", but

she hit the nail on the head and astounded me with her insight when, instead, she thought for a moment and then said,

"I'll miss the feeling here at this home."