A couple of days into the search, Nels asked me if I'd considered moving into something smaller and cheaper (which are far more available). Flashes of living in a tiny 3 bedroom apartment with our four wild girls and brand new baby flipped through my mind - along with a flood of the stress of that crazy time. My annoyed answer to his question make me smile and remembering the tears that followed make me laugh right out loud.
Sometimes I think, when faced with a new dilemma, I ought to just sit and think of what I'd like to do the least and then just go with that first. I think it would save me a lot of time. :) My mom always told me, "Never say never." The taste of "nevers" in my mouth has gotten pretty familiar over the years. :) Lucky for me, most of those nevers have turned out pretty well.
After exhausting all the other avenues and having only a couple more days to find a place to live before the new owners moved into our old house, I finally asked Nels what he thought about moving into a smaller townhouse that I'd previously ruled out. :)
Almost immediately after we got settled into our new home, I felt completely overwhelmed with how comfortable we are here. The layout flows smoothly and after moving a few things into a small storage unit we fit very comfortably.
It feels like home. Again.
I think this is such an amazing thing.
Home.
It truly is where your heart lies - and my heart lies with the people within these walls.
It's a soggy Sunday night. Nels has been taking a much-deserved nap since we got home from church about four hours ago while I've enjoyed some uninterrupted time crocheting and watching Church films and BBC shows. Upstairs my girls have spent the rainy afternoon and evening playing together in their bedroom. They've kept me smiling the whole time as I've caught snippets of their conversation and games. They are quite clearly playing with their new Lego people and building grand homes for all of them. Occasionally I hear them break out in random movie quotes and brief bits of "Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree". Clara is napping, but it makes my heart just swell right up to hear my older girls playing so happily with Violet. She loves them so much.
I wish so badly that I could hold on to these moments. That I could perfectly record the little voices as they drift down the stairs, their innocence as they share potions and inside jokes, the quiet, cozy light from the lamp, the drippy-drip off the roof, and the peace I feel all the way down to my toes. I wish I had a way to preserving it so that I could come back to this moment and play it over and over and over again.
This will just have to do - inadequate as it is.
We are so blessed.
