Goodbye, Baby

Well. I think we've made it.

We are past babyhood.

Potty training has been done for a while (we haven't bought diapers in probably two months, but I didn't want to jinx myself) and Clara can say her own name.

Goodbye, Cwawa.

I'm going to miss you more than you know.

(cue the tears)

How can you be so ready for something to end and yet want to go backward and start all over again at the same time? I honestly don't know that I'll ever feel like I don't want to have a little baby in my life. Especially MY little baby.

This is a hard time period for me. And I think it's going to last for . . . ever.

Unpacking . . .

It'll kind of be like unpacking your house after someone else packed it up. You're never sure what's in the box and all too often you've got a bunch of random things in there that don't belong with the rest and you don't really know what to do with them. Yep. That's what this post is going to be like.

Speaking of unpacking, I've still got about 25 boxes to unpack. I'm not thrilled. I'm tired of unpacking. I feel like I've been unpacking for 2.5 years.

It's been foggy for the past three days. Everything is covered in hoarfrost. The weeping birch trees look like frozen fountains. It's kinda magical.

Hazel, Elsie, and Lilie can think of nothing but going to see their cousin, Winston, who is now a mere 30 minutes away. I don't blame them, those Moores are pretty great.

All three of them are also adjusting to school really, really well. I know I mentioned this in the last post, but seriously, I can't even express what a relief this is for me. I worry so much that we're damaging them by not allowing them to put down roots anywhere, but they are a testament to me that we have all the stability that they need right here within our family. They teach me.

Violet and Clara have watched too much TV the past two months.

Violet and Clara are learning to play really, really well together. It makes my heart happy. Today they are dressed up as a princess and a jack-o-lantern.

Orange is Violet's FAVORITE color. That makes me happy.

Clara doesn't really love clothes. Unless I put her footie pj's on backward (we had to cut all the "footies" off months ago), she wakes up naked, freezing, and in a soggy bed (because she also takes off her diaper) at about 2:30 every morning. Since implementing the "straight-jacket" sleeping method, we've all been much happier.

Violet is getting new glasses sometime this week. I am really hoping that it (again) helps mellow out the melt-downs that are so uncharacteristic of her pleasant, easy-going personality. Winter comes along and she spends lots of time drawing and her eyes get so tired. Her old glasses are too small and hurt her ears, so she doesn't keep them on.

Amid the thousands of wonderful things that I've not recorded in the past year, Violet got her hair cut by her Aunt Genny this last Thanksgiving while we were in Utah. It's adorable and she loves it.

Clara loves to dance. Any music results in a spontaneous dance-party.

Clara is SO SASSY! Many, many unexpected things in her life are met with, "Why you do dat???" One of our last nights in Sandpoint, she was playing chase with Daddy and I scared her as she came flying around a corner. She jumped, squealed, and then immediately said, "Why you scare me, Mom?!!!" We took the girls to see "Frozen" a couple weeks ago and right at the most intense part of the movie, it's silent, and the princess has just turned to ice. Everyone is very sad, of course. Clara yells, "WHY YOU DO DAT, DAD???!!!" It "broke the ice" (haha) and everyone in the theater laughed.

My girls are growing up so much. While I was at our new place with the movers to unpack the truck, Hazel stayed home from school and babysat her three younger sisters for NINE HOURS - and was still smiling when I relieved her at 5:00. I was only a 1/4 mile away and checked on her frequently throughout the day, but she did awesome. I really count on my Hazel. She loves to read, loves to talk, loves to be with other people, and loves learning. She has one of the most pure hearts I've ever known.

Lilie reminds me of myself daily. She loves creating and colors. We had a tour of their new school the Friday before everyone came back from Christmas break and she asked repeatedly about the art class. :) She is an incredible artist. A true introvert, it is so hard to pull information from her about her day and what's on her mind anytime but in the quietest one-on-one moments. She talks plenty and LOUDLY, :) but it's hard to hear what's in her heart without listening. I'm trying to learn how to listen better.

Elsie is such a little people-person. She is loving her new school and LOVES being the "new girl". Her teacher adores her and commented on how wonderfully she's transitioning - as if she's always been part of their class. At her first parent-teacher conference in Sandpoint, her teacher had talked about the possibility of moving her up a grade. She's ready, both intellectually and socially and only misses the cutoff by a month. Nels and I spent a day or two thinking about it and in the end decided that she's right where she needs to be. She is really starting to develop helping others and reaching out to those who may be struggling as a big part of her personal identity. We feel that it's a benefit for her to be older in her class. It thrills my heart to see her take others under her wing so much. She is such a warm person.

This is Elsie with her friend Henry before we left Sandpoint. He was in both her Pre-K class last year and her Kindergarten class this year. To say that he LOVES Elsie would be an understatement.

Nels? He's doing good. He likes his new job and he even gets to come home for lunch on a regular basis. He told me last week that because of security measures, working real late at this job isn't even an option!! Can you believe it?! :) Really, they seem like a great company. And starting today Nels and I are doing another 30 day sugar fast - like we did last January. Gotta get ready for Costa Rica this summer! :)

As for me, I'm really looking forward to the day when I break down the last box. In the meantime, I scheme all day about what I want to do that evening when the kids finally go to bed and I "clock out" for the day . . . so far I haven't been able to actually DO that since we moved in, but I keep hoping.

(my first knitting project - in our temporary apartment - before the boxes and boxes and boxes came)

And most days, since I don't leave the house (and sometimes when I do), I wear something colorfully crazy --- because it makes me happy (and sometimes hides my hair that I haven't washed in three days).

I'll have to remember to pair up that hat with the orange tights, multicolored skirt, and blue slippers I'm wearing today. :)

Claraboo turns Two

Two years ago today, I sat in a comfy bed at the Agape Birth Center holding my sweet little baby.

Number five. Daughter.

Life was about to do somersaults, but for the moment, all was right in the world.

Over the past two years, repeatedly, I've vowed to write a post dedicated just to Clara. I didn't write one for her first birthday, not when she started walking, I never really recorded her first sets of words. It hurts my heart. It's been such a chaotic couple of years, but my little Clara has been like sunshine to me all along this crazy journey.

That first year, she was heaven-sent. Patient to a fault, sweet, easy-going, gentle, quiet. I will always treasure my memories of quiet nights rocking her in the glow of the streetlamp in the front room of our second story apartment while huge silent snowflakes fell.

Then she turned one. :)

This last year she has become a sassy little spit-fire. She is full of spunk and sparks, assertive and absolutely fearless.

She LOVES all animals. Whether it's a caterpillar, a snail, a kitten, a snake, or a horse, it's "Oh, tute!" She kinda takes after her mommy. Visiting the fair with her last month was a blast!

Last month when we went rafting with Aunt Wendie and G&G Moon, Clara fell asleep. After about an hour of "peace and quiet" and bees hovering all around, I here from the back of the raft, "Oh! Hi, buggy! I yu you!" (referring to a friendly bee buzzing over her sleepy face)

She has a special place in her heart for doggies. We babysat Jake's pup this last month and she adores MoMo. (Nebo) I could often find her snuggling up on the doggy bed with Nebo saying, "I yuv you, MoMo."

She has difficulty saying her own name, but is awesome at everyone else's. "cl" is a difficult combination for baby mouths.

She talks and sasses. A. Lot. She's not always super clear, but has no problem communicating her meaning. If I listen close enough, I realize that she is actually speaking really well, it's just a little fuzzy.

As mentioned, she is fearless. She loves water and has no comprehension of it's danger. She has tried to jump from the raft or sneak away from me to the end of the dock and slip into the watery depths unnoticed. Last month while visiting the chair lift at Schweitzer, she refused to sit back in the seat, instead opting to dangle her feet and lean forward as far as I'd let her.

She loves sugar - and pancakes. Blueberries are one of the only things that she eats consistently and always loves. It's all about the timing. Sometimes she loves it, sometimes she hates it. I'd say she's a picky eater, but the only thing I find that she will NOT eat is potatoes. She was SO excited tonight for her "coclate" cake!

For a 9 pound infant, she sure doesn't look it. Still under 25 pounds and so slender that she regularly slides her diaper right off her bummy. In fact, if I don't put a onesie on her, I cannot keep a diaper on her at all. Apparently she doesn't like them - or pants.

She is a bit of a wanderer and I've lost her a few times just in the backyard. She LOVES to be outside. She does not like to hold hands.

She adores her sisters and they think she's the cutest thing in the world. She holds her own with them and will not be pushed around. She tattles on her sisters like nobody's business and knows how to milk the sympathy. It's adorable.

She loves the riding lawn mower and can be found sitting on it almost every time she goes outside. She RAGES if someone is riding it without her.

Clara loves to read stories and loves to sing. She remembers words to songs and is on key when she sings along. Her favorite this year has been "Tiny Tim".

She loves to be tickled. "Mama? Ticklou?" "You want me to tickle you?" "YES!" She loves butterfly kisses and laughs and laughs and asks for more. She also says something that I haven't heard in about 8 years, "Mama, I hold you?" (will you hold me? my Hazie Baby used to ask the same thing.) Just last week she started saying "No way!"

She loves the trampoline, cannot get down on her own, and thinks playing "runaway" when I try to get her off is the best game in the world. She screams in delight and then frustration when I finally jump up on the tramp to grab her and bring her inside.

Loves to draw. On her legs, belly, face, and arms.

She is almost always happy and loves to laugh.

Every time I put her to bed, we repeat to each other:
*kiss* "I love you."
"I yuv you."
"Goodnight."
"Nigh, Night"
"Bye, bye."
"Bu-bye."

Her birthday today was happy and low key. The homemade chicken noodle soup was met with "Mmmm, nummy!" and the 'coclate' cake with sheer joy. This girl loves her some chocolate! She had so much fun with the candles. Over the course of the day she requested to have them relit about 27 times, squealing with excitement and clapping every time she'd blow them out again.

I love my little Clara Lettice. She brings so much joy into my life and I am so thankful that the Lord sent her when he did. I often feel like she's growing up too fast, but at the same time I'm so excited for each new thing she learns. She is such a delightful little person.

I love you, Claroo! Happy birthday, Baby Girl.

Summer Perfection: Part 1

From the get-go, we've always said that Sandpoint was a temporary move. A rest stop on the way to . . . wherever . . . we're going . . . eventually. :)

"Somewhere we'll stay for, I don't know, probably three to five years."

But you know what? I don't know how we'll EVER leave.

Not with weeks like this.

Today as I sat on the beach talking to friends and watching my kids play in the water, sand, and sunshine

I made a decision.

Honey, if things don't work out at Coldwater, we're livin' in a tent! (it can be done! we know a man who does.)

Seriously. How is it that you are not ALL living here with us?!

Clara, at almost 2, is still the sweetest little feisty angel. She holds her own with four older sisters and rolls with the crazy when we stay at the beach for five hours and miss naptime.

Monday she just snuggled right up on my lap mid-afternoon and fell right into dreamland. Holding my sleeping baby is like dreamland for me . . .

Tuesday we skipped the beach and I cleaned my bedroom. A miracle that resulted in the discovery of my keys (missing 10 days) and my glasses (missing 3 months).

Wednesday Nels skipped work and we took the girls to Silverwood. A blast that resulted in the realization that Hazel and Violet don't really love rollercoasters and adrenaline makes me talk a lot.

Dinner at Olive Garden with my beautiful girls, a (yet again) angelically nap-less bebe, 

and their handsome dad.

Today was just summer at it's finest.

Poor Lilie inherited her daddy's pink skin.

diving Elsie

While my angel baby AGAIN slept at the beach, for the first time since we moved here, I went swimming. It was SO FUN!!! Lilie, Hazel, and I swam out to the logs separating the beach and the boats with our friends the McClellands and played King of the Log. It was awesome. I love good friends!

After four hours in the sun, we returned home to pick thimbleberries across the road and golden raspberries in the backyard.

thimbleberries: fuzzy, delicious cousins of domestic raspberries

my "I'm ecstatic that I've not had to water this green grass once this summer" face

my "I'm in heaven" face

Again, I need to ask: how is it that you are all not living here WITH US?!