Release

There was once a time when sitting at this screen felt like second nature to me. As I'd trot through my day, I'd think in Blog. My mind felt alive with thoughts that I couldn't wait to release. I look back at those days and much of what I shared was trivial, mostly sweet joys of the day, but I also felt the thrill of giving life to something that was once just inside.

As I sat down just now, the Post Screen felt foreign to me --- wondering what it is that is inside. What is it I want to share? I've exhausted my avenues of time wasting today and I've either got to get it out so that I can stop non-feeling it or get busy so that I can tuck it away in my Later drawer.



This last month . . .

About a month ago, Nels came home and told me that Coldwater announced that they are "looking into alternatives" to stem the financial difficulties that they've been dealing with the last few years.

After the initial yikes! the peace came. Whatever happens will happen and we will be fine. The past two years have taught me nothing if not how to roll - and how to have faith that we'll keep on rolling to a better place - both outside and inside.

Last Wednesday, I called Nels while out shopping for Halloween costumes at Goodwill:

"What do you think of robbers?"

Nels: "Sure. Sounds good."

"Great! I've found perfection. What are you doing for lunch? Maybe we'll stop by."

N: "Um. I'm at home."

"Oh, you should have called me so that I would be home."

N: " . . . I'm taking the rest of the day off."

" . . . . . . Why? Is everything okay?"

N: " . . . I'll talk to you about it when you get home."


Coldwater Creek laid-off about 20% of their employees last week. Today is Nels's last day.

We have both felt the sweet peace that comes from the Spirit - that all will be well. Nels has felt very firmly that this whole process will lead to better things.

Bless him.

These last couple of months have been challenging. As we moved, Nels has been my rock. Constantly encouraging me and building me up. When I've felt like I'm running on fumes, he's been ready to take the next step and let me know it's not too hard. It's gonna be easy! :)

I love him.

With this new hurdle, I've also felt good. I feel confident. But at the same time, today I'm tired.

I so love stability and as I look forward, it just looks like uncertainty and change and it feels weighty. I know there are rays of goodness and light creeping around the edges of this blah. I know that once I get the toys cleaned and my bed made and my body washed, I'm going to feel better

- but it'd be a lie to not acknowledge that right now I just kinda feel like curling up and crying.