Murky

Oh my word. This process . . . I don't even know what to say about it.

As I've stated before, we have decided to do a short sale on our home. For many reasons.

For those of you who don't know what a short sale is, basically it's the process in which we ask the mortgage company to accept an offer for less than what we owe on the house and eat the difference. It sounds terrible, doesn't it? It is certainly not a situation that we ever expected to find ourselves in. We were assured that our house would have no problem selling for what we owed on it. Our home is lovely. It's in a good location. We could sell it for a GREAT price. But as the economy and the housing market have continued in their downward spiral . . . it's not going to sell for what we owe on it. It just isn't. There are way too many other short sales on the market for similar homes to ours. And renting it out? Well, without writing an entire post about out reasoning, we just really do not feel that renting is the right option for us.

We've had all of our paperwork for the short sale turned in since November. There are so many short sales and foreclosures being filed right now, that we were told from the get-go that it would take about six weeks for our file to come to the top of the very large pile. We were fine with that and right on time, around mid-January, it did. We were told that everything seemed to be in order except for one thing.

We are no longer living in our house.

Per FHA regulations, our home MUST be our primary residence to be qualified for a short sale. They make some exceptions, but since Nels's job change was "voluntary" they would have to file for what they call a "variance". The lady who had our file just needed some additional information before she could send the variance in for approval (or not). This was on the 12th of January. We got her that info the following Tuesday and assumed that everything was moving forward and we would know whether "they" had approved us or not soon.

On the 25th, when our realtor emailed her to get an update, she told him, "I still have the file on my desk."

WHAT????!!!!

At that point, totally confused as to WHY on earth she hadn't sent in for the variance yet, I started emailing and calling her on an almost daily basis - with no communication back from her. A week later, finally at my wits end, I called her supervisor. This was last Tuesday.

After getting the run-around with her for most of our conversation, she finally said that they'd get on it right away and find out what we needed to do, because the variance request had STILL not been turned in.

It should also be noted that we got an offer on our house - for the short sale price - at the beginning of January. We have someone waiting to buy our house. And for the past nearly FOUR weeks, our file has been sitting on this lady's desk. Going nowhere.

FINALLY, last Friday, this woman emailed me back. Telling me that after discussing our situation with her supervisor, they are positive that our variance will not be approved. That in order for the short sale to go forward, we must be occupying our house as our primary residence.

GAHHHHHHH!!!!

WHY COULDN'T SHE HAVE GIVEN ME THIS INFORMATION THREE WEEKS AGO!?

Oh. I am so frustrated. I have no issue with needing to be in our house. Nels and I have discussed it and it's not a problem for me to take the three younger girls back to Idaho Falls and live there for however long we need to while things are getting approved. What I don't understand is why some people are SO rude. Why couldn't this woman have called or emailed me back weeks and weeks ago to discuss this? So unprofessional. And rude and rude and rude and rude.

So. They will be sending an inspector out to our house to make sure that we're living there. {eye rolling} Apparently the fact that the utilities are on, nearly all of our furniture is still there, the food is still in our cupboards, and my fish tank is running just isn't enough evidence. They need to see me there. Living there. Primary residence. {sigh}

Hopefully today or (at the latest) tomorrow, we will hear back on WHEN the inspector will be coming. We will then pack up enough "necessities" for a while and head back to Idaho Falls. Just until everything is approved and the actual SALE part is underway.

This whole process has been so frustrating to me for many different reasons. I'm very thankful for all that I'm learning. I am unbelievably, eternally grateful that the Lord answered our pleas for Nels to be able to get a different job. That he's able to be home with his family and his stress levels have lowered exponentially. We are so VERY happy in that respect. The Lord has given us so much and we are SO thankful.

At the same time, as I've expressed, there have been many frustrations along this road as well. In some ways, I am actually really dreading going back to Idaho Falls. I love it there. It feels like home. Our HOME is still there. And the thought of having to leave it again . . . it makes my heart hurt at the very thought of it. I just want to be able to move on. I want to get the house sold. I want to find a new home here. I feel lost and I feel at times as if I'm weathering this period of our lives very badly. Sometimes I feel that I shouldn't even pray for the things I WANT anymore. As if it just sets me up for disappointment.

I hope through all of this, the one thing I can come to understand, without any doubt, is prayer. That I can come to understand the Lord's love for me. That I can understand how to hear better and how to see more clearly. That I can better understand HOW to pray. And how to receive answers. Because sometimes I feel so alone -- and I know that it's not HIM who has left me.
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But it will come. I know it will. I know it IS.

The fog is clearing. And I know on the other side, He'll show me that he was there all along . . .